WEBVTT 00:00:28.059 --> 00:00:28.619 Hello? 00:00:29.019 --> 00:00:29.759 How are you? 00:00:30.399 --> 00:00:31.759 Oh, I'm doing pretty well. 00:00:32.339 --> 00:00:36.619 Just sort of sitting here, you know, waiting to record a podcast. 00:00:36.679 --> 00:00:37.899 Yeah, I'm Clair. 00:00:38.439 --> 00:00:39.159 I'm Brianna. 00:00:39.179 --> 00:00:39.839 Yeah. 00:00:39.839 --> 00:00:40.599 Nice to meet you. 00:00:40.619 --> 00:00:43.159 Nice to meet you too. 00:00:43.179 --> 00:00:44.919 Hey, do you wanna do a podcast together? 00:00:45.319 --> 00:00:47.499 Sure, I'd love to do a podcast together. 00:00:47.519 --> 00:00:50.519 Do you wanna call it Salt Cravings and talk about our cravings? 00:00:50.539 --> 00:00:52.519 Sure, can we also solve those cravings? 00:00:52.539 --> 00:00:54.579 Yeah, I think we should solve those cravings. 00:00:54.799 --> 00:00:59.259 Do you want it to be about jokes, or do you want it to be about serious matters? 00:00:59.399 --> 00:01:06.239 I think I'd like it to be about jokes, specifically if we could make jokes wherein we pretend that we don't have a podcast already. 00:01:06.339 --> 00:01:08.839 I think those would be the best jokes for us to make. 00:01:08.839 --> 00:01:11.339 Yeah, those are original and good jokes. 00:01:11.419 --> 00:01:12.319 Should we start now? 00:01:12.339 --> 00:01:15.279 Do you wanna give me a craving? 00:01:15.299 --> 00:01:16.479 Sure, sure, sure, sure. 00:01:16.499 --> 00:01:17.519 Maybe we can solve it. 00:01:17.639 --> 00:01:18.239 Yeah, sure. 00:01:18.259 --> 00:01:24.759 Should we do an intro for the people of just like, hey, and welcome to Salt Cravings, my name's Brianna. 00:01:25.179 --> 00:01:26.779 You're Clair, blah. 00:01:26.799 --> 00:01:29.419 Yeah, this is like a podcast where we solve cravings. 00:01:30.759 --> 00:01:31.899 That's an interesting idea. 00:01:31.899 --> 00:01:32.699 Yeah, I like that. 00:01:32.899 --> 00:01:35.099 Cool, all right, I'll give you a craving then. 00:01:35.119 --> 00:01:35.579 Great. 00:01:40.319 --> 00:01:42.199 So my first craving today is ASMR. 00:01:48.739 --> 00:01:56.279 ASMR, I mean, specifically unintentional, we have to talk in this voice the whole time for this craving. 00:01:56.339 --> 00:01:59.119 Okay, this is the ASMR voice. 00:01:59.699 --> 00:02:03.699 So what is it about ASMR that gets you going? 00:02:04.039 --> 00:02:05.519 Don't please don't use that word. 00:02:05.539 --> 00:02:07.319 It is fully non-sexual. 00:02:07.799 --> 00:02:09.419 It's unintentional ASMR. 00:02:09.439 --> 00:02:16.499 It's when people are not necessarily trying to do ASMR, not like role play ASMR videos. 00:02:17.339 --> 00:02:26.639 I just love to see people like do things that are difficult and like take repetitive action if it's interesting. 00:02:26.659 --> 00:02:28.299 Let's get that good, good tangle. 00:02:30.059 --> 00:02:31.219 Should we maybe explain? 00:02:31.239 --> 00:02:33.499 Is there anyone who doesn't know what ASMR is at this point? 00:02:33.839 --> 00:02:35.799 You could at least say what the acronym means. 00:02:36.579 --> 00:02:43.939 Um, boy, automatically sympathetic motor response. 00:02:44.259 --> 00:02:48.239 Nope, you tried, but it's autonomous sensory meridian response. 00:02:49.799 --> 00:03:06.399 Sounds a lot more meaningless, but essentially ASMR is when certain sites, sounds, other sensual feelings, sensory inputs, sensory inputs, like give you tingles around like the back of your head, neck and back, and it can be a really nice sensation. 00:03:06.479 --> 00:03:10.419 And it is often thought it was very weird because a lot of it is very weird. 00:03:10.439 --> 00:03:16.299 And I feel very weird about like role play videos, which is where people pretend to be like doctors. 00:03:16.319 --> 00:03:19.119 There's one that's like they're cutting your hair or something. 00:03:19.279 --> 00:03:19.659 Yeah. 00:03:19.679 --> 00:03:23.059 Like, Ooh, we're just going to snip a little bit off here. 00:03:25.019 --> 00:03:27.679 Like it'll be, yeah, it will be literally stuff like that. 00:03:27.699 --> 00:03:31.319 So it's like all the discomfort of a haircut without actually getting the haircut. 00:03:31.899 --> 00:03:32.379 Yeah. 00:03:33.179 --> 00:03:37.479 I need ASMR that doesn't make me feel like I'm watching an ASMR video. 00:03:37.739 --> 00:03:41.799 You know, I need to be learning something so I can justify it in my internal brain. 00:03:41.799 --> 00:03:43.379 Educational ASMR. 00:03:43.399 --> 00:03:45.839 Educational ASMR is super duper cool. 00:03:45.839 --> 00:03:52.599 I watch one channel that's a dude making knives out of various materials that you wouldn't normally make knives out of. 00:03:52.619 --> 00:03:56.479 There's one channel that is about like Japanese wood carving. 00:03:56.679 --> 00:03:59.279 Some cooking channels can do this pretty well. 00:03:59.339 --> 00:04:01.779 When people have accents, that often helps. 00:04:01.859 --> 00:04:11.139 One of the more common ones is like medical training videos, which is just like it's a video of a doctor performing on like a patient as an actor of giving them a checkup or doing a certain thing for them. 00:04:11.339 --> 00:04:12.659 Some of them are very, very good. 00:04:12.939 --> 00:04:13.959 And stuff like this. 00:04:13.959 --> 00:04:15.439 And I'm like, oh, that's interesting. 00:04:15.459 --> 00:04:17.339 And also, oof, those tingles though. 00:04:18.059 --> 00:04:20.759 So I have tried to listen to some ASMR. 00:04:21.179 --> 00:04:21.999 I'm going to be honest. 00:04:22.219 --> 00:04:25.919 I just can't get behind the ASMR with voices. 00:04:25.939 --> 00:04:27.279 That doesn't do it. 00:04:28.159 --> 00:04:38.759 If there are words, if I understand the words, then I'm like, hmm, there are words in my ears, and I do not like how soft they are because it's kind of creepy. 00:04:39.079 --> 00:04:40.659 But I do like the cooking ones. 00:04:41.019 --> 00:04:41.639 I see that. 00:04:41.659 --> 00:04:43.859 I think like certain voices are very good. 00:04:44.119 --> 00:04:46.359 Accents are extremely good. 00:04:46.359 --> 00:04:48.059 Pretty much any accent at all. 00:04:48.219 --> 00:04:51.879 So does that mean there's like how some people are foot models? 00:04:51.899 --> 00:04:56.299 There's like ASMR, not models, but champions? 00:04:56.399 --> 00:04:57.039 There are, yeah. 00:04:57.059 --> 00:05:03.779 There's like, this is not really what I watch, because as I've said, I'm really more into like unintentional stuff. 00:05:03.799 --> 00:05:12.199 But for intentional ASMR, there's a lot of people out there who have very big channels full of lots of videos and are very popular with ASMR communities. 00:05:12.499 --> 00:05:19.619 It's actually quite an interesting subculture because it's like a group of people trying to get this thing taken seriously and not seen as a weird sex thing. 00:05:20.059 --> 00:05:22.219 You know my least favorite ASMR sounds? 00:05:22.579 --> 00:05:23.219 Mouth sounds? 00:05:24.579 --> 00:05:25.479 Yeah, it's the worst. 00:05:25.919 --> 00:05:26.759 It's the worst. 00:05:27.179 --> 00:05:27.919 Please stop. 00:05:28.099 --> 00:05:28.859 Please stop. 00:05:29.139 --> 00:05:30.799 You're bothering me and the listeners. 00:05:32.559 --> 00:05:37.859 I've watched a video before of someone using clay to replicate mouth sounds and somehow that's fine. 00:05:39.559 --> 00:05:44.419 But actual mouth sounds are like, no, you stop that. 00:05:44.779 --> 00:05:45.399 Stop that. 00:05:45.399 --> 00:05:56.519 But my question here, Clair, in order to solve the craving of unintentional ASMR, what's some other things that people can do that could serve as unintentional ASMR? 00:05:56.759 --> 00:05:57.959 Reading the newspaper. 00:05:57.979 --> 00:05:59.679 Ooh, that's good. 00:05:59.699 --> 00:06:04.179 I think the newspaper folding is just a good crinkly sound. 00:06:04.199 --> 00:06:05.479 It's a good crinkly sound. 00:06:05.599 --> 00:06:12.239 Oh, and you could read it out loud also, and that would be very good if you just read it very softly. 00:06:12.799 --> 00:06:15.779 Oh, eggs are $4.99 this week. 00:06:16.339 --> 00:06:18.279 Bananas are $2.00 for one. 00:06:18.659 --> 00:06:22.239 Today's story is there was a murder. 00:06:25.259 --> 00:06:33.099 That is the potential issue with reading the newspaper, is that some news is bad, and then you're just listening to someone read the newspaper, and you're like, oh, I'm sad now. 00:06:33.119 --> 00:06:34.359 But them tingles. 00:06:34.559 --> 00:06:35.899 Alternative. 00:06:36.319 --> 00:06:37.019 Alternative? 00:06:37.319 --> 00:06:38.859 It is just sex noises. 00:06:44.359 --> 00:06:49.419 Clair, do you want to explain more as to why that would A, work, and B, not be the worst? 00:06:50.499 --> 00:06:57.679 You don't ever tell someone it's sex noises, and you do just label it as walking through a squishy forest. 00:06:57.699 --> 00:06:58.379 No, no. 00:07:06.979 --> 00:07:09.579 Sound of someone slapping someone, you know? 00:07:11.059 --> 00:07:12.879 I slap my poor brother. 00:07:12.899 --> 00:07:15.539 This is bad. 00:07:15.559 --> 00:07:17.479 This is the worst place you could have gone, Clair. 00:07:17.499 --> 00:07:19.299 This is the worst place. 00:07:21.519 --> 00:07:22.799 This brother slaps. 00:07:30.499 --> 00:07:31.199 I hate that. 00:07:31.219 --> 00:07:31.759 Thank you. 00:07:31.819 --> 00:07:34.639 I think also, what about programming ASMR? 00:07:34.659 --> 00:07:36.219 Oh, like you're just typing? 00:07:36.279 --> 00:07:37.319 Yeah, you're just typing. 00:07:37.679 --> 00:07:38.959 And then it's like, so it's like... 00:07:38.979 --> 00:07:40.239 And every so often... 00:07:40.259 --> 00:07:40.679 And then it's like... 00:07:41.479 --> 00:07:42.399 Yeah, exactly. 00:07:45.179 --> 00:07:46.959 Why isn't this working? 00:07:47.939 --> 00:07:49.099 This will work really well. 00:07:49.599 --> 00:07:50.679 It worked yesterday. 00:07:52.979 --> 00:07:54.119 Where am I having this? 00:07:54.339 --> 00:07:56.139 I literally didn't change anything. 00:07:56.739 --> 00:07:57.699 What's happening? 00:07:58.099 --> 00:07:59.099 That's extremely good. 00:07:59.419 --> 00:08:02.139 Someone playing video games with the sound off. 00:08:08.559 --> 00:08:10.479 Is that not how other people play video games? 00:08:12.099 --> 00:08:15.799 There can be easy mode videos, hard mode videos. 00:08:15.819 --> 00:08:19.119 Easy mode videos is just like some game controls. 00:08:19.379 --> 00:08:19.999 Yeah, it is. 00:08:22.939 --> 00:08:24.899 What about some vacuuming ASMR? 00:08:25.219 --> 00:08:29.539 My upstairs neighbors are vacuuming, so it's a self-made. 00:08:29.559 --> 00:08:31.099 This is a new vacuum ASMR. 00:08:31.119 --> 00:08:31.519 Enjoy. 00:08:35.119 --> 00:08:35.639 Perfect. 00:08:35.879 --> 00:08:36.299 Great. 00:08:36.639 --> 00:08:38.319 Good vacuuming ASMR. 00:08:38.699 --> 00:08:41.879 I just think chugging sports water bottles. 00:08:43.319 --> 00:08:55.099 When it's break time and you take your water bottle, and because you have three water bottles and 20 people on a team, you never actually put the water bottle to your lips and you just sort of spray it in your mouth. 00:08:55.459 --> 00:08:55.799 Yeah. 00:08:56.199 --> 00:08:56.739 Just that. 00:08:56.759 --> 00:08:57.359 Yeah, that's great. 00:08:57.379 --> 00:08:59.439 That sounds like a really good auditory. 00:09:00.819 --> 00:09:02.299 That's my water bottle noise. 00:09:02.619 --> 00:09:03.879 I really, really like that. 00:09:03.899 --> 00:09:08.839 I think that would do super good things for my ears, which would go, oh yes, that's what I want. 00:09:09.359 --> 00:09:11.319 I want the wet, splishy, splashy. 00:09:11.999 --> 00:09:13.899 Give me the wet, splishy, splashy. 00:09:14.859 --> 00:09:17.499 Again, something that could be replicated with mouth sounds. 00:09:17.659 --> 00:09:18.819 I have a really good idea. 00:09:19.199 --> 00:09:20.959 Again, this is unintentional ASMR. 00:09:20.999 --> 00:09:22.799 Filming an ASMR video ASMR. 00:09:24.899 --> 00:09:26.719 How is that different than the ASMR? 00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:30.479 Well, it's a different camera. 00:09:30.719 --> 00:09:36.599 Watching someone do ASMR on the camera that they're doing the ASMR video on, right? 00:09:36.619 --> 00:09:39.839 It's from a different perspective, showing that whole process. 00:09:39.859 --> 00:09:42.339 And then you get into the editing process. 00:09:42.379 --> 00:09:43.779 That's all ASMR too. 00:09:44.579 --> 00:09:47.819 Not intended to be ASMR, but it's unintentional ASMR. 00:09:47.839 --> 00:09:52.099 It's very important that it not be someone being like, I want to role play this. 00:09:52.279 --> 00:09:53.599 I have an idea for ASMR. 00:09:54.119 --> 00:10:04.859 What if we took like four to five different instruments, and then we made them make noise in a way that together, they sort of made similar notes. 00:10:05.279 --> 00:10:09.019 Do you think like someone's voice could also be involved in that? 00:10:09.039 --> 00:10:11.159 Yeah, but it would have to match up with at least one of... 00:10:12.659 --> 00:10:13.039 I don't... 00:10:13.479 --> 00:10:13.919 yeah. 00:10:13.939 --> 00:10:15.479 They'd have to change the pitch or whatever of their voice. 00:10:19.359 --> 00:10:20.299 gotta get some wave tone. 00:10:20.319 --> 00:10:20.839 It's all about... 00:10:21.379 --> 00:10:23.359 we can call it wave tone ASMR. 00:10:23.719 --> 00:10:24.499 Yeah, I like that. 00:10:24.519 --> 00:10:25.359 I like that a lot. 00:10:26.219 --> 00:10:28.699 You got any wave tone ASMR that I can listen to? 00:10:31.759 --> 00:10:36.179 I'm loving this new wave tone ASMR video. 00:10:36.499 --> 00:10:38.199 It's WTASMR. 00:10:38.219 --> 00:10:39.499 Wetosmer. 00:10:39.499 --> 00:10:40.819 We'll call them Wetosmers. 00:10:40.819 --> 00:10:43.279 This is a good invention that no one's come up with before. 00:10:44.259 --> 00:10:46.639 Do you want to give me a craving? 00:10:47.739 --> 00:10:48.539 Yeah. 00:10:48.559 --> 00:10:54.179 I'm kind of scared that my first craving is a little similar to something we've come up to previously, but I do want to emphasize... 00:10:54.199 --> 00:10:54.799 It's okay. 00:10:55.499 --> 00:10:59.519 I have a really hard time enjoying bath time. 00:10:59.839 --> 00:11:02.879 And I think it's because the bath is just too hard. 00:11:03.319 --> 00:11:05.119 And I want a soft bathtub. 00:11:05.139 --> 00:11:07.399 So my craving is a soft bathtub. 00:11:07.599 --> 00:11:12.279 Just to emphasize, I don't want a fucking carpeted bathtub. 00:11:12.299 --> 00:11:17.379 You were really on that kick before, and you've just decided that that's no longer going to work for you? 00:11:17.439 --> 00:11:18.019 Yeah, no. 00:11:18.039 --> 00:11:25.179 See, other people can have carpeted bathtubs, but my bathtub, if it's soft, can't be carpeted. 00:11:25.199 --> 00:11:26.399 So this is the thing. 00:11:26.639 --> 00:11:29.019 When it comes to bath time, I hate baths. 00:11:29.879 --> 00:11:32.799 I hate baths because they get really boring, they get cold. 00:11:33.719 --> 00:11:38.659 But most importantly, I can put up with that stuff, because that at least gives me some enjoyment for like 10 minutes. 00:11:39.599 --> 00:11:44.899 It's so hard on the body to sit down on a flat, weirdly shaped surface. 00:11:45.399 --> 00:11:46.819 Yeah, it really is. 00:11:46.839 --> 00:11:48.579 Yeah, bathtubs are like awful. 00:11:48.599 --> 00:11:54.459 I've seen those like bath pillows and stuff that can be somewhat useful, but also like not really useful. 00:11:54.579 --> 00:11:56.459 I've never even heard of a bath pillow. 00:11:56.479 --> 00:11:57.559 My parents have one. 00:11:58.879 --> 00:11:59.839 Yeah, it can be useful. 00:11:59.859 --> 00:12:07.439 But like the worst thing about a bath is you have to have the right bath mat to sit your butt on, because you need to not be sliding around. 00:12:07.759 --> 00:12:12.999 I have to like shave in the bath, and so like that means I can't be sliding around with a razor in my hand. 00:12:13.019 --> 00:12:15.999 Slipping and sliding ASMR bath time. 00:12:16.019 --> 00:12:16.639 God, yeah. 00:12:16.799 --> 00:12:20.979 But also people make those very abrasive bath mats. 00:12:21.559 --> 00:12:22.939 There are like holes in them. 00:12:23.299 --> 00:12:25.159 I think I had one of those as a kid. 00:12:27.079 --> 00:12:27.799 It's not a good time. 00:12:27.819 --> 00:12:29.019 It's not good for bath. 00:12:29.259 --> 00:12:30.419 That's not a bath time mat. 00:12:30.439 --> 00:12:31.419 Good for shower time. 00:12:31.439 --> 00:12:33.239 Good for shower time, but not for bath time. 00:12:33.259 --> 00:12:36.559 You need something that's just like a good bath mat. 00:12:36.759 --> 00:12:39.379 Alternatively, the answer to this one is pretty obvious. 00:12:39.719 --> 00:12:40.799 Is it a shower? 00:12:40.959 --> 00:12:42.279 No, no, no, no, no, no. 00:12:42.299 --> 00:12:43.779 You need a soft bathtub, right? 00:12:43.779 --> 00:12:44.119 Yeah. 00:12:44.179 --> 00:12:45.539 Well, a marshmallow bathtub. 00:12:45.759 --> 00:12:46.339 Oh, okay. 00:12:46.359 --> 00:12:48.159 It's just made out of marshmallow. 00:12:48.179 --> 00:12:50.999 I don't see what, like, that's pretty simple. 00:12:51.019 --> 00:12:53.399 Okay, I have one problem. 00:12:53.899 --> 00:12:54.799 What's this problem? 00:12:54.819 --> 00:12:55.759 I'm gonna want to eat it. 00:12:56.319 --> 00:12:57.379 You know, like, I mean... 00:12:57.559 --> 00:12:58.819 There's no other problems. 00:12:58.839 --> 00:12:59.779 It's perfect otherwise. 00:13:01.339 --> 00:13:03.139 Like, what if I eat the bathtub? 00:13:03.179 --> 00:13:04.059 I mean, I think the... 00:13:04.119 --> 00:13:14.619 What if I turn around and I'm like, instead of sitting on my tush, I turn around and I just start face first into this bathtub because I want to get the gooey goodness into my face hole. 00:13:14.639 --> 00:13:16.599 I mean, like, that is your call. 00:13:16.619 --> 00:13:17.279 Like, you'll just... 00:13:17.879 --> 00:13:24.239 You know, maybe you have a reserve of marshmallow fluff to, like, you know, put in where you... 00:13:24.299 --> 00:13:25.879 So it's a snack while you bath. 00:13:26.319 --> 00:13:28.699 So why wouldn't I just eat the marshmallow fluff? 00:13:28.719 --> 00:13:29.699 Oh, you know what? 00:13:29.719 --> 00:13:30.199 There you go. 00:13:30.219 --> 00:13:33.079 You need marshmallows while you're in the marsh bath. 00:13:33.579 --> 00:13:39.079 What if you were to set up, like, a little campfire outside the bathtub so you could just roast the marshmallows in your... 00:13:39.219 --> 00:13:40.359 that you have? 00:13:41.299 --> 00:13:43.639 What if there's just a big fire under the tub? 00:13:45.279 --> 00:13:46.939 A new way of warming baths. 00:13:47.039 --> 00:13:48.479 Yeah, so instead of having... 00:13:48.499 --> 00:13:50.759 So it's just cold water that you then boil. 00:13:50.799 --> 00:13:51.699 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:13:51.699 --> 00:13:54.579 And then you get in, and it's sort of like a you bath stew. 00:13:54.599 --> 00:13:59.159 Now, the main issue with that is with the marshmallow bathtub, it would start to roast the marshmallow. 00:13:59.279 --> 00:14:04.419 Yeah, but, I mean, you get out once it's crispy, and then you have a big-ass marshmallow for supper. 00:14:04.799 --> 00:14:05.219 Great. 00:14:05.379 --> 00:14:07.559 And, you know, it's beautiful. 00:14:07.619 --> 00:14:09.459 Yeah, I mean, it's pretty full-proof. 00:14:09.799 --> 00:14:12.199 I mean, some people may want more permanent structures. 00:14:12.699 --> 00:14:15.799 Is there a more permanent soft structure? 00:14:15.859 --> 00:14:20.539 So, see, my main thing was, what if just a sponge bathtub? 00:14:21.899 --> 00:14:24.799 But then I was like, well, the water is gonna get absorbed. 00:14:25.159 --> 00:14:31.719 Well, that's why you need super water, which is incredibly dense water that won't get absorbed by- 00:14:31.739 --> 00:14:33.279 That's water if you use a super particle. 00:14:33.299 --> 00:14:34.379 It's super chemical. 00:14:34.399 --> 00:14:40.819 Sorry, it's super chemical is the technical term, where it just can't be absorbed by anything. 00:14:41.559 --> 00:14:43.899 Oh, what if you accidentally drink some? 00:14:44.739 --> 00:14:45.099 Dope. 00:14:46.819 --> 00:14:47.079 Oh. 00:14:47.859 --> 00:14:49.539 Well, if you do, then you get super powers. 00:14:51.499 --> 00:14:53.259 Because it's got super chemical in it, Clair. 00:14:53.459 --> 00:14:53.899 Great. 00:14:54.379 --> 00:14:55.139 That's how it works. 00:14:55.159 --> 00:14:56.479 It's just water and super chemical. 00:14:56.499 --> 00:14:58.439 It's not that special. 00:14:58.459 --> 00:14:59.619 Nothing that'll hurt you. 00:14:59.639 --> 00:15:00.779 Yeah, nothing that'll hurt you. 00:15:01.219 --> 00:15:07.879 I think I would also suggest, everyone puts water in a bath, but they don't think to put water in the bathtub. 00:15:08.379 --> 00:15:08.719 What? 00:15:09.279 --> 00:15:10.559 You know, like waterbeds? 00:15:11.819 --> 00:15:13.039 Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. 00:15:13.059 --> 00:15:14.139 Waterbed bathtub. 00:15:14.199 --> 00:15:14.979 Oh, my God. 00:15:15.179 --> 00:15:19.479 You have water in the tub and water in the tub, you know? 00:15:20.659 --> 00:15:22.279 And then you're just swimming in water. 00:15:22.299 --> 00:15:23.839 You're just swimming in water on water. 00:15:23.959 --> 00:15:28.439 It's like you're like 90% of the way to a sensory deprivation tank. 00:15:28.519 --> 00:15:30.639 Can I take this one step further? 00:15:30.699 --> 00:15:31.559 Of course you can. 00:15:31.579 --> 00:15:32.979 That's what this show is about. 00:15:35.599 --> 00:15:59.139 What if sort of instead of like a water bathtub, it's like a water bathtub suit that you then like wear up to your neck and you just lie down and you are just encased in the suit from neck down to your toes and then you fill that up with water and you're just sort of no more senses. 00:15:59.939 --> 00:16:03.519 Okay, this feels very close to a kink that probably exists somewhere. 00:16:04.459 --> 00:16:10.599 Also, my main concern with that was like I said, I tend to shave in the bath, right? 00:16:10.919 --> 00:16:11.619 Auto-shave. 00:16:11.679 --> 00:16:13.199 Auto-shaving, exactly. 00:16:13.219 --> 00:16:14.019 Shaves your whole body. 00:16:14.039 --> 00:16:16.599 It shaves your whole body and it does it perfectly, right? 00:16:16.719 --> 00:16:18.319 It just takes a note of... 00:16:18.339 --> 00:16:18.619 With lasers. 00:16:18.639 --> 00:16:19.919 Yeah, with lasers. 00:16:19.939 --> 00:16:20.399 It takes a note... 00:16:20.419 --> 00:16:21.939 It's fricking laser beams. 00:16:22.039 --> 00:16:22.459 Yeah. 00:16:22.819 --> 00:16:25.519 This is what people talk about when they talk about doing laser. 00:16:25.539 --> 00:16:26.419 This is what they mean. 00:16:26.439 --> 00:16:27.079 Yeah. 00:16:27.099 --> 00:16:27.919 Laser hair removal. 00:16:27.939 --> 00:16:30.459 Welcome to the laser Marsh Bath. 00:16:30.679 --> 00:16:32.019 No, I guess it's not Marsh Bath. 00:16:32.039 --> 00:16:33.019 It's water bath, right? 00:16:33.719 --> 00:16:34.879 What are we calling this? 00:16:35.219 --> 00:16:36.699 I mean, that's just the water bath. 00:16:38.499 --> 00:16:42.679 There's the water bath and then there's the water bath plus, and then there's the water bath plus suit. 00:16:42.979 --> 00:16:44.579 Yes, there's water bath plus suit. 00:16:44.819 --> 00:16:55.119 And it's important that it's very important to keep the distinction of water bath versus bath water, which is the bath water is in the water bath and you will be inside the bath water when you're in your water bath suit. 00:16:55.319 --> 00:16:57.599 Which has water in it. 00:16:57.619 --> 00:16:58.819 It has normal water in it. 00:16:58.839 --> 00:17:00.439 Well, it could be bath water as well. 00:17:00.459 --> 00:17:05.239 So you have bath water in your water bath suit, in your bath water, in your water bath bath. 00:17:05.599 --> 00:17:05.959 Great. 00:17:06.059 --> 00:17:06.919 One more problem. 00:17:07.179 --> 00:17:07.919 What's the problem? 00:17:08.299 --> 00:17:10.619 What if I want to snack? 00:17:10.959 --> 00:17:14.059 With normal bathtub, you have tools. 00:17:14.259 --> 00:17:16.019 You can set stuff up on your bathtub. 00:17:16.679 --> 00:17:18.979 It's a sturdy surface, it holds all your goods. 00:17:19.679 --> 00:17:33.679 But if it's a soft bathtub, how am I gonna get my good olives and cheese and my nice cold wine, two types of wine, one is in a red cup with red wine, one is in a white cup with white wine? 00:17:34.039 --> 00:17:35.439 Will you allow me to throw back? 00:17:35.879 --> 00:17:36.299 Sure. 00:17:37.279 --> 00:17:39.979 Because the handy helpers already solved this problem for us. 00:17:40.019 --> 00:17:42.319 We already have the handy helpers ready to go. 00:17:44.179 --> 00:17:47.239 They will feed you grapes like some emperor. 00:17:48.059 --> 00:17:51.259 Like some emperor in your water bath suit. 00:17:51.279 --> 00:17:53.459 What if we just had the handy helper suit? 00:17:54.199 --> 00:17:59.839 So can you describe to me what the handy helper suit is? 00:17:59.859 --> 00:18:01.919 Because I'm horrified by the idea. 00:18:03.099 --> 00:18:05.799 So did you ever watch Spy Kids? 00:18:07.199 --> 00:18:08.199 I think yeah. 00:18:09.239 --> 00:18:19.019 Do you remember the hand enemies that were just hands, but they were giant hands and two of the fingers were feet, two of the fingers were hands? 00:18:19.039 --> 00:18:21.319 I so do not fucking remember this. 00:18:21.339 --> 00:18:22.179 What the fuck? 00:18:22.199 --> 00:18:23.619 And the thumb was the head. 00:18:24.079 --> 00:18:25.799 So what Spy Kids was it? 00:18:25.819 --> 00:18:26.839 Number one. 00:18:27.139 --> 00:18:38.559 Okay, Spy Kids one was kind of a blur for me because I was deeply, deeply like terrified of the concept of those like blob things where they like turn people into those blob things. 00:18:38.579 --> 00:18:39.999 The hands. 00:18:40.019 --> 00:18:41.479 Oh, those are the hands. 00:18:41.499 --> 00:18:42.319 Yeah, those are hands. 00:18:42.339 --> 00:18:43.159 Oh, those are hands. 00:18:43.179 --> 00:18:45.059 Yeah, do you remember the guy with the hand face? 00:18:45.679 --> 00:18:46.239 God. 00:18:46.259 --> 00:18:48.119 Because he makes himself a hand. 00:18:48.239 --> 00:18:49.959 He turns himself into a hand face. 00:18:50.279 --> 00:18:53.959 I don't remember this, but like I was terrified of those things as a child. 00:18:54.259 --> 00:19:01.219 I was just like the experience of being transformed into one of these things and being unable to scream because all of your words are backwards. 00:19:02.559 --> 00:19:05.499 Yeah, so like so deeply horrifying to me. 00:19:05.519 --> 00:19:06.519 That's a great description. 00:19:06.739 --> 00:19:08.599 So imagine if that was a suit. 00:19:09.059 --> 00:19:16.339 No, Clair, I just told you this was my childhood fear and you've decided yes, let's make you into that. 00:19:16.359 --> 00:19:18.979 Okay, but consider it gives you grapes. 00:19:19.319 --> 00:19:20.359 It feeds you grapes. 00:19:20.939 --> 00:19:21.999 I guess that's a good point. 00:19:22.019 --> 00:19:25.739 It does have a thumb that just comes and stretches from behind your head. 00:19:25.759 --> 00:19:27.059 It goes around your shoulder. 00:19:27.079 --> 00:19:28.759 It's just like, here's a grape. 00:19:28.779 --> 00:19:29.759 It doesn't speak though. 00:19:29.779 --> 00:19:30.379 Maybe it does. 00:19:30.399 --> 00:19:31.699 It has speakers all over. 00:19:31.719 --> 00:19:32.639 Great. 00:19:32.959 --> 00:19:34.779 Just sort of you hear the voice in your head. 00:19:35.019 --> 00:19:36.039 Are you able to speak? 00:19:36.059 --> 00:19:36.839 Can I have the grape? 00:19:36.959 --> 00:19:39.399 Well, it depends on its mood. 00:19:39.999 --> 00:19:41.139 Oh, I don't like this. 00:19:41.339 --> 00:19:42.339 Can you take it off? 00:19:42.579 --> 00:19:44.119 Sure, eventually. 00:19:44.139 --> 00:19:46.439 Yeah, I really... 00:19:46.519 --> 00:19:50.399 Hey, Clair. 00:19:50.479 --> 00:19:52.459 Hey, Clair, we don't often veto things on this show. 00:19:52.699 --> 00:19:53.419 We really don't. 00:19:53.439 --> 00:19:54.879 But I'm vetoing this one. 00:19:55.179 --> 00:19:58.539 Because again, I cannot emphasize enough how hor- 00:19:58.699 --> 00:20:04.299 there is a part of me right now that is seven years old and she is terrified of the words that you're saying. 00:20:05.299 --> 00:20:09.059 The other option is it could just be out of some pillowy material. 00:20:09.079 --> 00:20:12.019 It's hydrophobic, pillowy material. 00:20:12.139 --> 00:20:14.099 Yeah, it's sort of like memory. 00:20:14.119 --> 00:20:15.699 It's not funny, it's just a good solution. 00:20:15.799 --> 00:20:18.239 Yeah, it's not... 00:20:18.259 --> 00:20:21.379 I don't think this is... 00:20:21.399 --> 00:20:23.139 We're here to solve cravings. 00:20:23.339 --> 00:20:24.519 And I think we just did that. 00:20:24.539 --> 00:20:26.179 What you do with a stranger when you first met them. 00:20:26.199 --> 00:20:28.399 Do you want to give me another craving? 00:20:28.459 --> 00:20:29.799 I would love to give you another craving. 00:20:30.139 --> 00:20:33.039 My second craving is for the things I'm writing. 00:20:34.899 --> 00:20:38.159 Listen, here's the simple truth about writers. 00:20:38.879 --> 00:20:40.019 Writers don't want to write. 00:20:40.179 --> 00:20:44.919 They want to see things come into existence fully formed so that they can read them. 00:20:45.179 --> 00:20:47.879