WEBVTT 00:00:29.512 --> 00:00:30.672 And I'm Clair. 00:00:30.692 --> 00:00:32.172 Who's ready for summer? 00:00:32.192 --> 00:00:34.112 I'm a little too hot. 00:00:34.452 --> 00:00:35.892 It's like very hot. 00:00:35.912 --> 00:00:37.192 It's way too hot. 00:00:37.192 --> 00:00:42.392 It's like, I'm just like completely butt naked, and I'm still like super duper hot. 00:00:42.452 --> 00:00:46.812 I've decided to just become jello, because then I can melt in on myself. 00:00:46.872 --> 00:00:49.492 Yeah, and it's like so incredibly hot. 00:00:49.512 --> 00:00:51.832 It's like basically the hottest it's ever been. 00:00:52.012 --> 00:00:53.612 10, it's been 10 hot. 00:00:53.732 --> 00:00:55.232 Yeah, the sun is on fire. 00:00:55.252 --> 00:00:56.512 It's that hot. 00:00:56.532 --> 00:00:57.152 Wow, what? 00:00:57.212 --> 00:00:58.312 Yeah, the sun's on fire. 00:00:58.332 --> 00:00:58.872 Since when? 00:00:59.072 --> 00:01:02.792 Well, because it's so hot since this morning, because it's super hot today. 00:01:02.812 --> 00:01:05.032 God, what was the sun made out of before? 00:01:05.052 --> 00:01:05.632 I forgot. 00:01:06.572 --> 00:01:09.372 Sun stuff, star stuff. 00:01:09.372 --> 00:01:11.892 It was made of star stuff, just like you and me, Clair. 00:01:11.912 --> 00:01:14.452 Wow, so when are we gonna catch on fire? 00:01:14.772 --> 00:01:18.352 Well, you know, we'll see how long the podcast comes for. 00:01:20.492 --> 00:01:24.632 Yeah, are you having fun with summer so far with the encroaching summer? 00:01:24.652 --> 00:01:25.892 It's not summer, but it's summer. 00:01:25.912 --> 00:01:27.752 You know how it's not summer, but it's summer? 00:01:27.852 --> 00:01:31.512 You know how it's not summer, but global warming makes everything hotter? 00:01:33.072 --> 00:01:34.872 We don't talk about it, it's not real. 00:01:35.172 --> 00:01:37.632 If we don't talk about it, it's not real. 00:01:38.172 --> 00:01:40.972 So this is a funny podcast where we don't talk about that. 00:01:41.072 --> 00:01:43.532 Yeah, and instead we talk about cravings. 00:01:43.672 --> 00:01:46.972 How's your fun in the sun giving you any particular summer cravings? 00:01:47.292 --> 00:01:52.932 Yeah, I mean, it has, but not for the, well, maybe for the cravings today. 00:01:52.952 --> 00:01:57.332 It's more like, how can I avoid the sun at all costs? 00:01:57.412 --> 00:02:07.712 Because my first craving is, I really, really, really keep thinking about how badly I want to play PlayStation 4. 00:02:09.052 --> 00:02:17.512 My craving is just to play the PlayStation 4, because I haven't owned a PlayStation since the second one. 00:02:17.792 --> 00:02:20.552 It came out in many years ago. 00:02:20.852 --> 00:02:23.252 It did come out in many years ago. 00:02:23.272 --> 00:02:24.432 That is accurate. 00:02:24.912 --> 00:02:29.892 Is there, what is it about the PlayStation 4 that is particularly special? 00:02:29.912 --> 00:02:35.852 Because we've talked before about how much you enjoy playing your Nintendo Switch and the Switch rules. 00:02:35.912 --> 00:02:36.292 It does. 00:02:36.312 --> 00:02:37.192 It is an awesome console. 00:02:37.212 --> 00:02:37.592 You're right. 00:02:37.612 --> 00:02:38.952 And has very particular things. 00:02:39.312 --> 00:02:44.012 Is there anything special about the PlayStation 4 that makes you really want to get on that? 00:02:44.032 --> 00:02:45.012 Yeah, two games. 00:02:46.012 --> 00:02:50.412 One, the game inspired by the Smash character, Joker, Persona 5. 00:02:50.472 --> 00:02:59.432 Okay, it feels like maybe the cause and effect that you've described there might be a little backwards. 00:02:59.932 --> 00:03:00.552 Explain. 00:03:00.712 --> 00:03:09.372 From my understanding, and now I'm no expert, Joker may have come from Persona 5 before being in Smash. 00:03:09.612 --> 00:03:10.812 I don't think that's correct. 00:03:11.332 --> 00:03:11.952 Oh, okay. 00:03:12.032 --> 00:03:16.932 I would stake many, many time and money on that. 00:03:17.252 --> 00:03:20.692 A lot, in fact, as we've established as an amount. 00:03:20.712 --> 00:03:26.252 You would stake many, many time and money, a lot, in fact, on? 00:03:26.412 --> 00:03:28.892 On Smash coming before Persona 5. 00:03:28.952 --> 00:03:34.112 Yeah, I think a cursory Google search would tell you that Smash actually came out in the early 80s. 00:03:36.592 --> 00:03:37.992 Wow, you're totally right. 00:03:37.992 --> 00:03:44.172 Smash came out in 1979 and Persona 5 came out 2060. 00:03:44.432 --> 00:03:50.072 I'm so glad that we have Google, this optimized engine that really gives us the truth. 00:03:51.632 --> 00:03:52.692 So, yeah, always. 00:03:52.692 --> 00:03:54.632 So you want to play Persona 5. 00:03:54.712 --> 00:03:59.492 Is this a craving for wanting to play Persona 5 or what's the other game that makes you want to play? 00:03:59.512 --> 00:04:06.812 The other game is the Spyro Trilogy Remastered because I did play, I think it was Age of Dragons. 00:04:07.052 --> 00:04:08.612 I think it was the second one or whatever. 00:04:08.852 --> 00:04:10.932 Back on the PlayStation 1, but only at... 00:04:11.932 --> 00:04:13.692 I don't know if you had this memory. 00:04:13.972 --> 00:04:17.892 You ever go to like your friend's house and they have the console that you don't? 00:04:17.932 --> 00:04:20.532 So whenever you're over, you play their console? 00:04:20.572 --> 00:04:20.972 Yes. 00:04:21.052 --> 00:04:22.932 That was the PlayStation 1 for me. 00:04:22.952 --> 00:04:26.892 And so I always got to play Spyro, but I never got to own Spyro. 00:04:27.152 --> 00:04:30.132 And so my craving is to play the PlayStation. 00:04:30.212 --> 00:04:39.792 Yes, perhaps it is these specific two games and perhaps these are not AAA titles, like most PlayStation owners would care about. 00:04:39.812 --> 00:04:40.132 Yeah. 00:04:40.292 --> 00:04:42.192 I guess God of War looked okay. 00:04:42.472 --> 00:04:43.752 Spider-Man seemed cool. 00:04:43.852 --> 00:04:47.072 Spider-Man also, honestly, yeah, Spider-Man did seem cool. 00:04:47.212 --> 00:04:48.012 These are good games. 00:04:48.872 --> 00:04:50.672 Yeah, you just jump around, you just jump around. 00:04:50.692 --> 00:04:53.512 I love the Spider-Man game where you just hop. 00:04:53.592 --> 00:04:54.472 You just hop. 00:04:54.912 --> 00:04:56.692 Spider-Man's actually a bunny now. 00:04:56.712 --> 00:04:59.092 Yeah, I didn't know why they didn't call it Rabbit Man. 00:04:59.132 --> 00:04:59.792 Rabbit Boy. 00:04:59.812 --> 00:05:00.872 Rabbit Boy. 00:05:01.052 --> 00:05:03.832 Rabbit Boy jumps buildings in a single hop. 00:05:03.852 --> 00:05:04.592 Nope, that's two. 00:05:04.832 --> 00:05:06.752 Oh, no, no, it took three, four. 00:05:06.932 --> 00:05:08.152 No, that's too many hops. 00:05:10.312 --> 00:05:13.512 I mean, those are some good game choices, and it seems like a good console. 00:05:13.772 --> 00:05:14.312 I guess- 00:05:14.332 --> 00:05:15.912 How do I solve this craving? 00:05:16.032 --> 00:05:18.892 Yeah, I think I have an idea. 00:05:19.032 --> 00:05:21.312 We raid Sony's headquarters. 00:05:21.652 --> 00:05:22.892 We have similar ideas. 00:05:23.092 --> 00:05:25.972 How are we raiding Sony's headquarters? 00:05:25.992 --> 00:05:29.412 I was immediately ready to plan a heist, so I'm glad we're on the same- 00:05:29.412 --> 00:05:31.312 Heist episode, heist episode. 00:05:31.772 --> 00:05:32.412 All right. 00:05:33.172 --> 00:05:35.912 Yeah, you know, it's been like 10 episodes since our last heist. 00:05:35.972 --> 00:05:38.032 So it's time for another heist. 00:05:38.052 --> 00:05:44.092 And we have new technology from our tech wizard that we keep in the basement of our heist facility. 00:05:44.392 --> 00:05:48.812 And we've come prepared with these new tools of ultimate heisting. 00:05:48.912 --> 00:05:49.312 Yes. 00:05:49.572 --> 00:05:50.572 What are these tools? 00:05:50.592 --> 00:05:53.772 What are these tools that we're going to use to break into Sony's headquarters? 00:05:53.892 --> 00:05:56.972 So the first is the detector. 00:05:57.792 --> 00:05:59.292 Oh, that's a really good name. 00:05:59.312 --> 00:06:02.312 It really tells you exactly what it is and what it does. 00:06:02.332 --> 00:06:05.452 So what it does is it detects things. 00:06:08.752 --> 00:06:13.732 And it will scan a place and detect what's in it. 00:06:14.772 --> 00:06:16.312 So it'll just sort of know. 00:06:16.352 --> 00:06:20.232 And it looks like something completely innocuous. 00:06:20.792 --> 00:06:21.452 In what way? 00:06:21.612 --> 00:06:25.332 Well, it looks like a robot. 00:06:25.412 --> 00:06:29.292 So no one would ever suspect that it is. 00:06:29.412 --> 00:06:31.052 I have one question. 00:06:31.312 --> 00:06:33.252 Sorry, how is it scanning? 00:06:33.272 --> 00:06:35.252 Is it scanning with a barcode? 00:06:35.272 --> 00:06:37.832 Yeah, so like a laser. 00:06:38.912 --> 00:06:39.152 One. 00:06:39.172 --> 00:06:39.932 Right, yeah. 00:06:39.952 --> 00:06:45.012 So like a laser scanner comes out and goes up and down the building. 00:06:45.032 --> 00:06:46.272 And it sees through walls. 00:06:46.332 --> 00:06:47.632 Is it just a big printer? 00:06:47.652 --> 00:06:49.772 It might be a printer, but... 00:06:50.392 --> 00:06:54.492 Well, it started as a printer, but we've modified it. 00:06:54.692 --> 00:06:55.472 Given it life. 00:06:55.672 --> 00:06:56.432 Given it life. 00:06:56.792 --> 00:06:58.992 Given it some laser scanning potential. 00:06:59.112 --> 00:07:00.572 Also, X-ray capabilities. 00:07:00.572 --> 00:07:01.792 It sees through walls. 00:07:02.532 --> 00:07:06.172 Which is how it can detect all the things that are inside. 00:07:06.312 --> 00:07:07.452 Okay. 00:07:07.472 --> 00:07:10.352 And so it just sort of up and down. 00:07:10.452 --> 00:07:16.732 Alright, so when you say it detects things, what are the limits to this? 00:07:16.752 --> 00:07:17.892 What can it not detect? 00:07:18.112 --> 00:07:22.532 Is there like a lead to Superman's vision sort of thing? 00:07:22.552 --> 00:07:25.772 Yeah, it can detect anything that isn't metal. 00:07:28.112 --> 00:07:29.592 Aren't most buildings metal? 00:07:29.612 --> 00:07:32.192 Wait, I'm pretty sure Sony has a lot of metal. 00:07:32.212 --> 00:07:33.852 This is not gonna help us. 00:07:33.872 --> 00:07:43.772 Well, no, see, this is where you're thinking short-sighted because it detects the things that aren't metal, and therefore you know what is metal. 00:07:44.172 --> 00:07:48.612 And you can see the outlines of the metal things because they won't show up on the scan. 00:07:48.632 --> 00:07:53.472 And also it shows you where all the people are, unless, again, unless the people are robots. 00:07:54.752 --> 00:07:57.332 What if the building has metal girders? 00:07:57.872 --> 00:08:01.332 Well, that's not a problem because it sees through walls. 00:08:02.032 --> 00:08:03.552 Oh, okay, even if they're metal. 00:08:03.652 --> 00:08:04.452 It wouldn't see those. 00:08:04.532 --> 00:08:06.212 Oh, okay, so metal walls don't... 00:08:06.232 --> 00:08:07.252 No, it's not like the metal... 00:08:07.272 --> 00:08:07.992 It's like an exception. 00:08:08.012 --> 00:08:11.612 It's not the metal blocks it, it's that it can't see metal. 00:08:13.152 --> 00:08:13.932 When it would look like... 00:08:13.952 --> 00:08:15.992 It's not that it's opaque, it's that it's transparent. 00:08:16.012 --> 00:08:16.932 It's completely transparent. 00:08:17.152 --> 00:08:21.272 It would look like Sony's headquarters are in the middle of a park, essentially. 00:08:21.792 --> 00:08:26.292 No, it'd be just them floating in a void, especially if the floor is like metal and the walls are metal. 00:08:26.312 --> 00:08:28.752 It's just, wow, this is a weird void Sony. 00:08:28.852 --> 00:08:30.852 But, you know, that's only one part of our plan. 00:08:30.872 --> 00:08:31.752 That's just one of... 00:08:31.812 --> 00:08:32.972 That's just one tool. 00:08:33.032 --> 00:08:34.932 That's just one tool in our arsenal. 00:08:34.992 --> 00:08:35.472 Yeah. 00:08:35.492 --> 00:08:38.472 What's another tool that's right up our arsenal? 00:08:38.692 --> 00:08:46.892 So it's the Frappling Hook, which it's a grappling hook, but it looks like a Frappuccino. 00:08:46.912 --> 00:08:52.272 So you can just carry it around, and you can even drink it. 00:08:52.652 --> 00:08:53.012 Yeah. 00:08:53.032 --> 00:08:55.412 But the more you drink it, the shorter the line gets. 00:08:55.672 --> 00:08:59.352 So if you drink it too much, your grappling hook's really short. 00:08:59.412 --> 00:08:59.972 So my... 00:09:00.052 --> 00:09:06.672 Okay, so my first question is like, how does that work in terms of the tech? 00:09:06.932 --> 00:09:09.292 Because, you know, we have our tech wizard locked in the basement. 00:09:09.552 --> 00:09:10.972 He can never leave, ever. 00:09:11.232 --> 00:09:15.492 But we usually do try to get him to explain how the tech works. 00:09:15.512 --> 00:09:18.872 So is the grappling hook the liquid? 00:09:19.172 --> 00:09:26.732 Well, yeah, you see, the real technology behind this is the coffee to string converter. 00:09:26.892 --> 00:09:28.192 Is it slime? 00:09:28.732 --> 00:09:29.712 The coffee? 00:09:30.432 --> 00:09:31.612 No, it's coffee. 00:09:31.812 --> 00:09:35.112 And it converts coffee into string. 00:09:35.132 --> 00:09:36.632 Not just regular string? 00:09:36.852 --> 00:09:37.732 Strong string. 00:09:38.652 --> 00:09:40.292 Trademark, strong string. 00:09:40.312 --> 00:09:41.832 I believe that's just called strong. 00:09:44.032 --> 00:09:44.992 Strong string. 00:09:45.272 --> 00:09:45.952 So you know what? 00:09:45.972 --> 00:09:46.852 There probably is. 00:09:46.872 --> 00:09:52.652 Like, if you catch it at a bad moment, like if it gets interrupted or something, it's probably just going to become slime. 00:09:52.932 --> 00:09:54.132 Yeah, that makes sense. 00:09:54.312 --> 00:09:58.412 And then you can't convert it either way because your converter, I mean, it's stuck. 00:09:58.692 --> 00:10:00.952 It's not strong string or strong. 00:10:01.012 --> 00:10:02.332 It's not coffee. 00:10:02.352 --> 00:10:04.412 So you have to be careful when you use it. 00:10:04.552 --> 00:10:08.792 Yeah, you have to whisper to it for five seconds to complete the transformation. 00:10:08.992 --> 00:10:10.212 What do you whisper to it? 00:10:10.292 --> 00:10:12.232 Well, it depends which way you're going. 00:10:12.512 --> 00:10:14.552 Which way you're going? 00:10:14.672 --> 00:10:17.152 Are you turning into coffee or are you turning into string? 00:10:17.172 --> 00:10:18.512 Let's say you're turning into string. 00:10:18.532 --> 00:10:20.132 What is something you'd whisper to it? 00:10:21.292 --> 00:10:26.172 You'd have to whisper like, strong string, strong string, strong string, strong string. 00:10:26.392 --> 00:10:28.132 And then if you go to the coffee, it's just yum. 00:10:33.992 --> 00:10:37.952 So it's very, it's very much a chant, it sounds like. 00:10:37.972 --> 00:10:38.932 Yeah, it's magic. 00:10:38.992 --> 00:10:40.012 It's tech magic. 00:10:40.172 --> 00:10:41.052 It's tech magic. 00:10:41.072 --> 00:10:47.032 I mean, that's how I, I'm not the tech wizard locked in the basement, so I'm describing it as tech magic. 00:10:47.152 --> 00:10:48.612 I assure you it is science. 00:10:48.632 --> 00:10:52.132 Well, I don't assure you it's the tech boy that we have. 00:10:52.452 --> 00:10:54.432 The tech boy in the distance. 00:11:01.412 --> 00:11:02.792 Tech boy, the tech wizard. 00:11:02.792 --> 00:11:03.272 Yeah. 00:11:03.432 --> 00:11:04.472 Yeah. 00:11:04.872 --> 00:11:05.432 It's weird. 00:11:05.452 --> 00:11:06.772 It's like he doesn't want to leave. 00:11:06.892 --> 00:11:12.212 Do you want to like tell me how you would use the Frappling Hook? 00:11:12.232 --> 00:11:13.092 Yes, absolutely. 00:11:13.112 --> 00:11:14.432 So how can we use this? 00:11:14.772 --> 00:11:17.352 So I think what we'll find. 00:11:17.432 --> 00:11:19.532 So when we use, let's use the detector. 00:11:19.872 --> 00:11:28.352 And the detector says that all the PlayStation 4s are kept on the third level of the Sony building. 00:11:28.372 --> 00:11:29.492 How many levels are there? 00:11:29.832 --> 00:11:31.932 There's like 12. 00:11:32.372 --> 00:11:33.352 Okay, cool. 00:11:33.372 --> 00:11:33.612 Great. 00:11:33.632 --> 00:11:34.872 So it's not that. 00:11:34.892 --> 00:11:36.132 Yeah, so it's a quarter of the way up. 00:11:36.392 --> 00:11:42.212 And so basically, the plan is you take your Grappling Hook. 00:11:42.232 --> 00:11:43.472 You take your Frappling Hook. 00:11:43.592 --> 00:11:45.392 Apologies, sorry. 00:11:45.552 --> 00:11:46.192 Very important. 00:11:46.212 --> 00:11:47.352 Frappling Hook TM. 00:11:50.632 --> 00:11:51.832 And you go string, string. 00:11:52.112 --> 00:11:53.032 Get some string. 00:11:53.312 --> 00:11:55.552 Grapple right up to that third floor. 00:11:56.132 --> 00:11:57.512 Because there's a ledge there. 00:11:57.532 --> 00:11:58.832 There's a little ledge there. 00:12:00.232 --> 00:12:01.432 The detector showed us that. 00:12:01.532 --> 00:12:02.532 Okay, great. 00:12:02.552 --> 00:12:07.372 This is great because once we're on that edge, we can just whisper yummy, yummy, yummy, yum, yum, yum. 00:12:07.652 --> 00:12:11.392 And like no one knows how we got up there, so it couldn't have been us. 00:12:11.692 --> 00:12:12.992 Exactly, exactly. 00:12:13.072 --> 00:12:16.092 And then we use what I'm calling the unglasses. 00:12:18.592 --> 00:12:20.872 Did we get a name and you just renamed it? 00:12:20.892 --> 00:12:23.332 Or like, is that what they were called? 00:12:23.712 --> 00:12:26.952 We got a name, it was pretty stupid. 00:12:26.972 --> 00:12:30.372 It was something like technology... 00:12:30.632 --> 00:12:32.632 Ocular modification unit. 00:12:32.652 --> 00:12:35.652 Yeah, technology ocular modification unit. 00:12:35.672 --> 00:12:37.432 And that was very wordy. 00:12:37.592 --> 00:12:39.392 We wanted to call it the tomu. 00:12:39.432 --> 00:12:42.072 And like, I think the unglasses really fits. 00:12:42.092 --> 00:12:42.932 The unglasses really fits. 00:12:43.112 --> 00:12:45.852 But what it does is exactly what it sounds like. 00:12:46.332 --> 00:12:48.212 It modifies technology. 00:12:49.392 --> 00:12:51.172 Is that what it sounds like? 00:12:51.272 --> 00:12:52.992 Well, it's a technology modifier. 00:12:53.012 --> 00:12:53.872 The unglasses? 00:12:54.072 --> 00:12:55.072 Yeah, the unglasses. 00:12:55.092 --> 00:12:59.332 Well, you know, its original technical name is what it sounds like. 00:12:59.352 --> 00:13:02.852 The unglasses, much better for selling, much better for marketing. 00:13:02.872 --> 00:13:06.232 You know, we're all about marketing here at Salt Cravings. 00:13:06.692 --> 00:13:08.272 Marketing, marketing, marketing. 00:13:08.532 --> 00:13:09.532 Capitalism is good. 00:13:09.552 --> 00:13:11.252 Sponsored by unglasses? 00:13:11.552 --> 00:13:14.172 The unglasses can just modify technology. 00:13:14.192 --> 00:13:17.852 So we'll use it to open up the windows. 00:13:18.872 --> 00:13:21.192 Because the windows at Sony are tech windows. 00:13:21.212 --> 00:13:21.852 That's true. 00:13:21.972 --> 00:13:23.132 They have tech shutters. 00:13:23.432 --> 00:13:27.132 So we just open up the tech shutters and unlock the tech windows. 00:13:27.492 --> 00:13:27.972 Great. 00:13:28.132 --> 00:13:32.252 So once we're now in the third floor of Sony, this is great. 00:13:32.272 --> 00:13:33.312 We're almost there. 00:13:33.332 --> 00:13:34.492 It's home free. 00:13:34.552 --> 00:13:39.492 Like we're so close, but there's a security guard coming. 00:13:39.552 --> 00:13:41.032 What are you going to do about that, Clair? 00:13:41.192 --> 00:13:44.872 Well, I'm going to take out my podcast gun. 00:13:44.892 --> 00:13:47.352 Your podcast gun? 00:13:47.372 --> 00:13:47.912 Uh-huh. 00:13:48.192 --> 00:13:49.752 I'm going to shoot podcasts. 00:13:51.452 --> 00:13:58.292 So what is a podcast gun, and how do you shoot podcasts, and what does it do? 00:13:58.352 --> 00:14:00.092 Well, I'll answer that in order. 00:14:00.312 --> 00:14:03.752 A podcast gun is a gun that shoots podcasts. 00:14:03.772 --> 00:14:09.712 A podcast gun shoots podcasts, and you have to shoot it in order to get the podcasts out. 00:14:09.732 --> 00:14:11.792 I think I answered all of those correctly. 00:14:11.812 --> 00:14:14.372 How does this help with the security guard? 00:14:14.612 --> 00:14:20.272 Well, I mean, once he's going to be too busy listening to those podcasts. 00:14:23.372 --> 00:14:29.852 So, like, once he's distracted, once we've gotten past this guard, then it's home free. 00:14:29.872 --> 00:14:32.712 Oh, but the door. 00:14:32.872 --> 00:14:35.332 The door, and it's not a tech door. 00:14:36.512 --> 00:14:39.292 Unfortunately, because, like, otherwise we can just use the technology modifier. 00:14:39.312 --> 00:14:39.872 It's made of wood. 00:14:39.892 --> 00:14:43.072 Which also I'm using to deactivate the cameras, of course. 00:14:43.092 --> 00:14:43.672 Of course, yeah. 00:14:43.692 --> 00:14:44.652 I don't even need to reset. 00:14:46.352 --> 00:14:47.512 But it's a wooden door. 00:14:48.292 --> 00:14:53.232 And we all know from video games that you can't use technology on wood. 00:14:53.512 --> 00:14:54.252 It's true. 00:14:54.332 --> 00:15:03.272 And so I think the only thing left to do, of course, is to genetically modify the wood. 00:15:03.372 --> 00:15:04.092 Oh, great. 00:15:04.252 --> 00:15:05.252 How are we doing that? 00:15:05.272 --> 00:15:06.052 What are we using? 00:15:06.292 --> 00:15:12.212 Well, we're using this thing called Genetic Modification Unit of Genetic Modification. 00:15:12.452 --> 00:15:15.152 You know, the, uh, gngn. 00:15:19.172 --> 00:15:20.552 This really rolls off the tongue. 00:15:20.652 --> 00:15:21.152 Yeah, I know. 00:15:21.172 --> 00:15:22.232 This sounds great. 00:15:22.252 --> 00:15:22.632 I mean, like... 00:15:22.652 --> 00:15:23.792 And so what it does... 00:15:23.812 --> 00:15:25.552 Just opens a big hole in it? 00:15:25.712 --> 00:15:29.052 Well, it turns the door into something else. 00:15:29.732 --> 00:15:30.792 Mm-hmm. 00:15:30.812 --> 00:15:31.992 And then you roll your dice. 00:15:33.892 --> 00:15:35.312 And you pick from the chart. 00:15:35.332 --> 00:15:37.712 You pick from the chart of what it turns it into. 00:15:37.772 --> 00:15:38.652 It is a dice. 00:15:39.192 --> 00:15:41.732 It is random of what it changes it into. 00:15:43.112 --> 00:15:45.532 Let's roll it and let's see what it comes out with. 00:15:46.252 --> 00:15:46.772 Fire. 00:15:47.072 --> 00:15:49.412 Okay, the door is fire now. 00:15:49.432 --> 00:15:53.592 The door is fire, and that means it's, you know, gonna fall and we can just step over the fire. 00:15:53.852 --> 00:15:56.912 And here we are at the PlayStation 4. 00:15:56.932 --> 00:15:58.692 I am home free. 00:15:59.052 --> 00:16:00.452 We escape, obviously. 00:16:00.472 --> 00:16:03.692 And the building burns down because of the fire door. 00:16:03.712 --> 00:16:05.772 We have the last PlayStation 4. 00:16:05.972 --> 00:16:06.972 Well, we grabbed two. 00:16:06.992 --> 00:16:11.212 We sell one on eBay for like $10 million because it's the last PlayStation 4. 00:16:11.232 --> 00:16:13.472 And then we play Spyro in Persona 5. 00:16:13.672 --> 00:16:14.492 This is great. 00:16:14.512 --> 00:16:16.512 Thank you for helping me solve my craving. 00:16:16.692 --> 00:16:18.172 Do you want to give me a craving? 00:16:18.192 --> 00:16:21.052 Yeah, can I just say that was a very weird sequel to Ocean's 8. 00:16:21.272 --> 00:16:25.472 I believe that's called Ocean's 11. 00:16:25.812 --> 00:16:27.432 No, it's Ocean's 9 actually. 00:16:27.692 --> 00:16:28.632 Nine and three quarters. 00:16:32.852 --> 00:16:34.332 So you got your PlayStation 4. 00:16:34.532 --> 00:16:35.532 Everything's good. 00:16:35.852 --> 00:16:40.552 All that remains is to have some fun activities in the sun. 00:16:40.812 --> 00:16:46.652 This is not one that I do exclusively in the sun, but it is one that I tend to do in the sun, and it is swimming. 00:16:47.132 --> 00:16:48.472 Wow. 00:16:48.712 --> 00:16:56.892 Because I have chronic pain, one of the few ways that I'm able to exercise is by swimming, and it's a really, really fun time. 00:16:56.992 --> 00:16:58.672 Get that good liquid all over you. 00:16:58.712 --> 00:17:03.632 Yeah, I love when I get the liquid all over me, and it's just like all over me, and I'm just in the liquid. 00:17:04.212 --> 00:17:06.472 It's like really fun to be just like in the liquid. 00:17:06.492 --> 00:17:08.492 It's like very sportsy and splashy. 00:17:08.512 --> 00:17:11.412 You know what we say on Salt Cravings, get in that liquid. 00:17:11.672 --> 00:17:13.952 Get in that liquid and sports and splash. 00:17:14.132 --> 00:17:26.752 The main issue with swimming, though, is it is an imperfect way to exercise regularly, and it is imperfect for how much work it takes. 00:17:27.052 --> 00:17:36.432 Because here's a list of problems with swimming, and what I'm hoping we can do here is make swimming better and go through this list of issues. 00:17:36.472 --> 00:17:38.032 Well, what if we just go one by one? 00:17:38.052 --> 00:17:40.132 Just like, what's the first issue? 00:17:40.152 --> 00:17:56.972 So the first issue is getting there and getting changed and all of that, because we're trans, and it's the most stressful experience in the entire world to get changed in a change room, so you always have to go into the bathroom, it takes more time. 00:17:56.992 --> 00:18:05.992 Anyway, the first issue is having to change out of your day clothes where you exist in the world and your swim clothes where you exist in the sea. 00:18:06.012 --> 00:18:07.512 I think I have a solution. 00:18:07.672 --> 00:18:08.492 What's the solution? 00:18:08.512 --> 00:18:10.812 It is inspired by Radiology Labs. 00:18:13.272 --> 00:18:14.692 I don't like where this is going. 00:18:14.712 --> 00:18:18.912 So when you enter a Radiology Lab, you have to walk through a big scanner. 00:18:18.912 --> 00:18:29.512 Now, what if instead of buying a swimsuit, you walk through a big room, and as you're walking through the room, it takes your clothes, and you are now wearing a swimsuit. 00:18:30.432 --> 00:18:32.752 Yeah, no changing required. 00:18:32.952 --> 00:18:34.332 This is the swimsuit room. 00:18:34.352 --> 00:18:35.132 This is great. 00:18:35.832 --> 00:18:41.912 My main question, you said it's, you know, inspired by radio... 00:18:42.132 --> 00:18:43.052 Radiology. 00:18:43.092 --> 00:18:44.272 Radiology, yep. 00:18:44.292 --> 00:18:45.232 Yeah, I got one. 00:18:46.352 --> 00:18:50.512 How much radiation exposure are we talking about here? 00:18:50.792 --> 00:18:53.452 It depends on the number of times you go through it. 00:18:53.892 --> 00:18:58.412 So let's say, theoretically, because if I want to exercise, you know, maybe I want to do it daily. 00:18:58.432 --> 00:19:00.452 What if I'm looking at doing it daily? 00:19:01.872 --> 00:19:07.832 I know units of radiation, and I would say that it gives you five. 00:19:08.092 --> 00:19:10.812 Okay, five units of radiation. 00:19:10.892 --> 00:19:11.852 It gives you five. 00:19:12.152 --> 00:19:13.472 Okay, it gives you five. 00:19:13.732 --> 00:19:19.992 How many days before I risk radiation poisoning? 00:19:20.232 --> 00:19:24.272 I'm gonna be honest, and I don't say this a lot on Salt Cravings. 00:19:24.292 --> 00:19:25.672 I don't know. 00:19:25.892 --> 00:19:28.112 That information is behind a paywall. 00:19:28.372 --> 00:19:37.892 Okay, so what you're saying here is, like, you can't technically access this technology because it's behind a paywall. 00:19:38.252 --> 00:19:40.532 It still sounds like a pretty good idea to me. 00:19:40.552 --> 00:19:41.632 It does sound like a good idea. 00:19:41.652 --> 00:19:42.252 I think it's perfect. 00:19:42.272 --> 00:19:43.532 I think it's a good solution. 00:19:43.552 --> 00:19:44.212 This is a great solution. 00:19:44.232 --> 00:19:44.692 That's step one. 00:19:44.712 --> 00:19:46.452 What's the next problem with swimming? 00:19:46.472 --> 00:19:53.792 So the next problem with swimming, you know, it is fun to splash about in the water, and swimming is very fun if you do it with a friend. 00:19:54.952 --> 00:20:02.112 But I get swimming free because I'm on disability, and some of my friends don't get that, and therefore, they end up having to pay again and again and again. 00:20:02.132 --> 00:20:02.992 And so they don't... 00:20:03.292 --> 00:20:08.652 I don't always want to put them through that and make them experience, you know, having to pay again and again and again and again. 00:20:08.892 --> 00:20:16.272 Which is to say, how can I make swimming fun on my own so I don't have to like take someone with me and do that whole thing? 00:20:17.312 --> 00:20:18.892 Because right now, it's boring. 00:20:18.892 --> 00:20:21.092 I can't exactly listen to a podcast in the pool. 00:20:21.272 --> 00:20:21.952 Okay. 00:20:23.192 --> 00:20:24.392 Yeah, a pool cast. 00:20:24.392 --> 00:20:30.572 I mean, there's like, I mean, buy waterproof headphones or bring a sex doll. 00:20:30.592 --> 00:20:31.832 And now you have your friend. 00:20:32.292 --> 00:20:33.772 And the sex doll will float. 00:20:33.792 --> 00:20:34.732 No, I see. 00:20:35.012 --> 00:20:36.492 And you're no longer alone. 00:20:36.512 --> 00:20:43.292 Okay, well, I see where you've gotten confused about what the purpose of having a friend there serves for me. 00:20:43.332 --> 00:20:49.832 Well, the sex doll is just because I don't really know many other blow up dolls that are full size. 00:20:49.932 --> 00:20:54.292 What I mean is, it's fun because it's social, and it's social experience. 00:20:54.312 --> 00:20:55.832 You get to talk with them. 00:20:55.852 --> 00:20:56.352 You can name your... 00:20:57.672 --> 00:20:59.072 No, well, you can... 00:20:59.092 --> 00:21:00.692 can the sex doll respond? 00:21:01.232 --> 00:21:03.032 We could put a speaker in it. 00:21:03.032 --> 00:21:04.292 No, well, no. 00:21:04.472 --> 00:21:05.652 Wait, wait. 00:21:06.272 --> 00:21:08.112 What if we hooked it up to Skype? 00:21:08.132 --> 00:21:08.832 No, well, okay. 00:21:08.852 --> 00:21:10.272 What if we hooked it up to Skype? 00:21:11.532 --> 00:21:12.172 And then... 00:21:12.192 --> 00:21:17.132 and then your friend could talk to you, and it looked like you weren't alone. 00:21:20.472 --> 00:21:30.792 These damn kids replacing real human connection with Skypedian voices connected to sex dolls in the pool, in the public pool. 00:21:30.972 --> 00:21:33.152 Yeah, yeah, I think that would work. 00:21:33.472 --> 00:21:34.912 Tell me why that wouldn't work. 00:21:35.372 --> 00:21:41.972 I cannot think of a reason except for all of them. 00:21:42.852 --> 00:21:45.372 So I cannot think of a specific reason. 00:21:45.872 --> 00:21:47.292 It is a bad idea. 00:21:47.292 --> 00:21:48.612 I do want to put that out. 00:21:48.612 --> 00:21:50.752 Okay, well, there's one. 00:21:50.772 --> 00:21:57.012 So the main one of my concerns is having a sex doll in a public pool with children around. 00:21:57.232 --> 00:21:58.212 A little questionable. 00:21:58.252 --> 00:21:59.532 It's like a blow up. 00:21:59.552 --> 00:22:01.712 You can put a shirt on it. 00:22:01.932 --> 00:22:07.452 If you're really that against nudity at a goddamn pool. 00:22:07.472 --> 00:22:08.892 Like, all right then. 00:22:09.092 --> 00:22:14.472 Sorry that this like plastic nudity is worse than your normal nudity. 00:22:14.492 --> 00:22:19.432 No, Clair, Clair, how often do you think people are new to the public pool? 00:22:20.092 --> 00:22:21.272 Way too often. 00:22:21.632 --> 00:22:23.592 Way, way, way too often. 00:22:26.812 --> 00:22:32.532 Are you sure you've been going to public pools and not to some other type of area? 00:22:32.632 --> 00:22:41.692 I am unfortunately positive that there are almost certainly always at least one naked person when I go to the pool. 00:22:41.932 --> 00:22:43.312 Is that in the change room? 00:22:43.592 --> 00:22:45.192 They start in the change room. 00:22:47.852 --> 00:22:55.992 If you ever see a blow up sex doll that is naked, it might be me with that sex doll at the pool. 00:22:56.012 --> 00:22:56.772 Okay, okay. 00:22:56.792 --> 00:22:58.792 I mean, I guess it's a fine... 00:22:58.812 --> 00:23:05.472 Now, I'll have my friend, and you'll be alone, and I'll have my podcast headphones that are waterproof. 00:23:06.132 --> 00:23:07.312 We'll both be listening. 00:23:08.852 --> 00:23:10.492 The sex doll will be listening? 00:23:10.512 --> 00:23:12.792 Yeah, the sex doll also has headphones. 00:23:13.812 --> 00:23:17.472 Is the person who's Skyping in listening, or is it just the sex doll? 00:23:17.492 --> 00:23:19.932 Depends if it's a good podcast or not. 00:23:20.112 --> 00:23:21.232 I think they can mute it. 00:23:21.452 --> 00:23:23.532 Okay, so they might want to mute this one. 00:23:25.392 --> 00:23:28.032 Sure, that's another good solution. 00:23:28.312 --> 00:23:31.212 And then the third, now the third problem. 00:23:31.212 --> 00:23:32.532 Yeah, is this the final one? 00:23:32.592 --> 00:23:34.172 This is the final one. 00:23:34.192 --> 00:23:35.972 Oh, it's gotta be a doozer then. 00:23:36.152 --> 00:23:39.332 It's basically the biggest, most unsolvable problem in the world. 00:23:39.452 --> 00:23:39.892 Uh-huh. 00:23:40.132 --> 00:23:44.772 When you get out of pool, you try to dry off, but does it work? 00:23:44.792 --> 00:23:45.152 Wet. 00:23:47.732 --> 00:23:51.592 So, I think we can all understand exactly what I mean there. 00:23:51.612 --> 00:23:53.932 It's like when you come out of pool, wet. 00:23:54.932 --> 00:23:55.732 Try to dry? 00:23:55.812 --> 00:23:56.232 Wet. 00:23:56.572 --> 00:23:57.272 Still wet? 00:23:57.552 --> 00:23:57.912 Wet. 00:23:58.072 --> 00:23:58.472 Hair? 00:23:58.512 --> 00:23:58.912 Wet. 00:23:59.832 --> 00:24:00.212 Wet. 00:24:01.032 --> 00:24:01.452 Face? 00:24:01.532 --> 00:24:01.912 Wet. 00:24:01.992 --> 00:24:03.532 Can I recommend something? 00:24:03.952 --> 00:24:04.332 Sure. 00:24:04.572 --> 00:24:06.052 Have you tried a towel? 00:24:06.372 --> 00:24:06.992 Still wet. 00:24:07.952 --> 00:24:09.172 See, here's the thing, Clair. 00:24:09.172 --> 00:24:10.052 Here's the main issue. 00:24:10.472 --> 00:24:10.792 Uh-huh. 00:24:11.112 --> 00:24:12.012 Here's the main issue. 00:24:12.212 --> 00:24:23.932 I have fairly thick hair, and the issue with thick hair is it kind of absorbs water like a sponge, and no matter how much you try to dry it out with a towel, it remains damp. 00:24:24.092 --> 00:24:24.672 I got it. 00:24:24.712 --> 00:24:25.212 I got it. 00:24:25.772 --> 00:24:27.072 The spongier towel. 00:24:27.092 --> 00:24:34.732 It's spongier than your hair, and it is a towel, so it is a big floppy sponge that you can just absorb. 00:24:34.772 --> 00:24:41.512 And you got to be careful because it's really absorbent, and if you're not too careful, it is just going to start absorbing your body liquids. 00:24:41.892 --> 00:24:44.692 Okay, so it'll absorb the liquid in your hair? 00:24:44.712 --> 00:24:45.672 Yeah, no, no, no, no. 00:24:45.692 --> 00:24:47.752 It'll dry out your hair completely. 00:24:47.852 --> 00:24:51.312 If you ever drop it in a pool, the pool will be gone. 00:24:51.332 --> 00:24:55.852 Not only the water, it'll evaporate so fast that the pool will disappear. 00:24:55.872 --> 00:24:56.472 Okay, wow. 00:24:57.272 --> 00:24:58.912 That's a very absorbent sponge. 00:24:58.932 --> 00:25:04.632 Yeah, you know like when a star collapses in on itself so fast that it can create a black hole? 00:25:04.772 --> 00:25:11.832 Yeah, if you drop this sponge in like just a pool of water, it's gonna react like cesium, but also this... 00:25:12.452 --> 00:25:13.712 Yeah, yeah. 00:25:13.912 --> 00:25:15.612 You perfectly nailed it. 00:25:16.512 --> 00:25:16.952 Great. 00:25:17.252 --> 00:25:18.452 So I'm glad you got it. 00:25:18.472 --> 00:25:18.992 So like... 00:25:21.592 --> 00:25:22.412 What is this? 00:25:22.432 --> 00:25:23.372 What's happening? 00:25:23.392 --> 00:25:25.152 The droplets of water coming out of the sponge. 00:25:25.232 --> 00:25:25.592 I don't... 00:25:26.912 --> 00:25:27.292 Real... 00:25:30.292 --> 00:25:31.192 This is great. 00:25:31.492 --> 00:25:33.292 So when you wring it out... 00:25:34.892 --> 00:25:38.572 If you wring it out over your head, it's just like a really quick shower. 00:25:38.592 --> 00:25:41.132 It seems like it might be more than a quick shower. 00:25:41.152 --> 00:25:43.332 It's like a salty or chlorinated shower. 00:25:43.352 --> 00:25:46.752 Yeah, chlorinated shower is exactly what I like to take. 00:25:46.772 --> 00:25:49.832 It's illegal to take these to beaches because of the water. 00:25:50.152 --> 00:25:52.412 First of all, chlorine shower, not a great idea. 00:25:52.692 --> 00:25:53.952 Gonna keep it real. 00:25:54.152 --> 00:25:56.232 Not the best idea, but you don't have to use it for that. 00:25:56.252 --> 00:25:57.072 So I guess it's fine. 00:25:57.452 --> 00:26:02.352 Second concern, it is gonna dry out your body. 00:26:02.372 --> 00:26:03.452 You use it with tongs. 00:26:04.012 --> 00:26:06.072 That doesn't seem like it helps. 00:26:06.272 --> 00:26:07.592 I mean, no more wet. 00:26:08.132 --> 00:26:09.552 Your hair, not wet. 00:26:09.832 --> 00:26:11.612 Your body, not wet. 00:26:11.832 --> 00:26:13.332 No more wet, unwet. 00:26:13.852 --> 00:26:16.572 Well, your body is 70% water. 00:26:17.052 --> 00:26:19.432 But your hair is less probably. 00:26:20.972 --> 00:26:25.192 Right, but my concern is it might soak up all that water and dry you out completely. 00:26:25.212 --> 00:26:27.992 This is what the tongs are for, so then you pat yourself with it. 00:26:28.312 --> 00:26:31.072 And it doesn't activate so fast that it sucks. 00:26:31.092 --> 00:26:32.092 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:26:32.252 --> 00:26:34.192 It's like when you... 00:26:34.432 --> 00:26:34.812 It's like... 00:26:36.412 --> 00:26:36.812 Uh-huh. 00:26:37.532 --> 00:26:37.912 Uh-huh. 00:26:38.652 --> 00:26:39.212 Got it. 00:26:40.292 --> 00:26:41.932 What if it sucks all the water out of the tongs? 00:26:44.172 --> 00:26:45.352 What, the water tongs? 00:26:45.652 --> 00:26:47.992 Well, no, just, you know, tongs probably have liquid in them. 00:26:48.192 --> 00:26:48.572 Really? 00:26:48.852 --> 00:26:52.072 What if it thinks that the metal is liquid? 00:26:52.132 --> 00:26:54.272 What if it thinks the metal is liquid? 00:26:54.332 --> 00:26:58.212 Yeah, because you know how, like, metal is liquid when it heats up enough? 00:26:58.512 --> 00:27:01.392 What if it tries to heat up the tongs so it can take the liquid? 00:27:01.872 --> 00:27:04.212 You know everything can become a liquid, right? 00:27:04.412 --> 00:27:06.572 Yeah, that's my main concern. 00:27:06.612 --> 00:27:07.432 Oh, okay. 00:27:07.452 --> 00:27:10.132 What if it tries to make everything liquid, Clair? 00:27:10.312 --> 00:27:12.092 Oh, it's the liquefier. 00:27:12.112 --> 00:27:13.452 It cannot be satisfied. 00:27:13.472 --> 00:27:19.712 It hungers for liquid, and it will liquefy everything in its quest for more liquid. 00:27:19.712 --> 00:27:21.032 That's my main concern. 00:27:21.092 --> 00:27:24.512 And that's the last tool that we took on our espionage run. 00:27:24.532 --> 00:27:26.272 It's the liquefier. 00:27:26.552 --> 00:27:27.552 What did it do? 00:27:27.712 --> 00:27:31.132 It just turned Sony into liquid after it turned on fire. 00:27:31.152 --> 00:27:32.632 Oh, so we put out the fire? 00:27:32.652 --> 00:27:34.192 We put the fire into liquid. 00:27:34.472 --> 00:27:35.552 We made liquid fire. 00:27:36.592 --> 00:27:38.132 Then we sold that on eBay too. 00:27:38.692 --> 00:27:39.872 We're very rich. 00:27:40.112 --> 00:27:42.032 You know, all this is nitpicking. 00:27:42.152 --> 00:27:54.612 Really, it seems like we've developed a better swimming experience with the only possible side effects of radiation poisoning, sex doll in a public pool, and murdering everyone. 00:27:54.752 --> 00:27:59.952 And murdering everyone in sucking the liquid out of absolutely everything. 00:28:01.032 --> 00:28:01.732 Sounds better. 00:28:02.192 --> 00:28:03.532 Minor concerns. 00:28:03.652 --> 00:28:06.012 Yeah, overall positive experience. 00:28:06.372 --> 00:28:08.212 Overall fairly positive. 00:28:08.212 --> 00:28:09.992 Yelp says 3.5. 00:28:11.892 --> 00:28:14.812 Is Yelp reviewing our craving solutions now? 00:28:15.072 --> 00:28:15.412 Yep. 00:28:15.492 --> 00:28:17.552 Yeah, we have to give Yelp... 00:28:17.572 --> 00:28:18.632 Yelp certified cravings. 00:28:18.652 --> 00:28:21.952 Yeah, we have to give Yelp ratings to all of our craving solutions. 00:28:21.972 --> 00:28:24.692 How would you rate our heist solution? 00:28:24.812 --> 00:28:27.612 It's like PS4 out of 5. 00:28:28.812 --> 00:28:29.452 Fucking... 00:28:29.472 --> 00:28:32.372 Tell me your next craving. 00:28:33.072 --> 00:28:33.912 I'm mad at you. 00:28:34.112 --> 00:28:35.332 Tell me your next craving. 00:28:35.352 --> 00:28:37.832 Tell me your next craving so I can just forget. 00:28:38.632 --> 00:28:40.552 Forget about the words you just said. 00:28:41.992 --> 00:28:46.152 So I just want to read my next craving verbatim. 00:28:47.352 --> 00:28:49.472 It says, me games, but good. 00:28:49.832 --> 00:28:52.152 And then in bracket, was me tomo good? 00:28:52.172 --> 00:28:58.952 And I did look this up before we started recording, and me tomo got shut down. 00:28:58.952 --> 00:29:00.292 So I think the answer is no. 00:29:02.172 --> 00:29:05.172 Tell me a little bit more about me games, but good. 00:29:05.412 --> 00:29:11.152 So do you remember like the find me and the puzzle games from like the DS or whatnot? 00:29:11.172 --> 00:29:15.132 You'd like have your me, and then you'd pass someone with your DS. 00:29:15.152 --> 00:29:18.712 Yeah, it's like me pass or whatever. 00:29:18.732 --> 00:29:19.632 Yeah, your me pass. 00:29:19.652 --> 00:29:21.432 Me plaza, whatever. 00:29:22.252 --> 00:29:26.572 So you'd like bring your 3DS with you or whatever, or DS. 00:29:26.592 --> 00:29:28.812 I don't even remember how old the me games were. 00:29:28.972 --> 00:29:29.372 Yeah. 00:29:29.392 --> 00:29:32.072 Your 1DS or your, I think it was your 3DS. 00:29:32.092 --> 00:29:33.092 Your 3DS. 00:29:33.112 --> 00:29:34.012 Or your 2DS. 00:29:34.032 --> 00:29:34.892 Yeah, you bring those. 00:29:34.912 --> 00:29:35.552 Not your 1DS. 00:29:35.572 --> 00:29:44.492 You bring those with you, and if you pass someone, you had street pass, and so they would come into your game and you could use them in mini games. 00:29:44.712 --> 00:29:46.152 They all fucking sucked. 00:29:46.312 --> 00:29:46.952 They did. 00:29:46.952 --> 00:29:50.052 Except the find me, which was okay. 00:29:50.072 --> 00:29:52.772 Find me was okay, but it could have been better. 00:29:52.792 --> 00:29:54.112 They did make a second one. 00:29:54.332 --> 00:30:01.732 I will say the last game that I remember having a lot of fun with that had me's prominently features would have been Wii Sports Resort. 00:30:01.992 --> 00:30:05.252 And the Wii Sports in general, those games were really fun. 00:30:05.272 --> 00:30:07.012 Wii Sports Resort was a whole lot of fun. 00:30:07.032 --> 00:30:10.072 I played the sword fighting mini game so goddamn much. 00:30:10.092 --> 00:30:10.592 Yeah. 00:30:10.752 --> 00:30:13.752 Was it like, was that a me game though? 00:30:14.092 --> 00:30:16.112 It had me's prominently featured. 00:30:16.132 --> 00:30:16.992 It was like about. 00:30:17.012 --> 00:30:18.892 It was me's on the island. 00:30:18.892 --> 00:30:21.472 It was me's everywhere. 00:30:21.792 --> 00:30:23.632 It was a swarm of me's. 00:30:24.572 --> 00:30:26.312 Not the me's. 00:30:27.032 --> 00:30:28.672 Don't let your me's be dreams. 00:30:28.912 --> 00:30:30.732 So I wanted a good me game. 00:30:30.932 --> 00:30:33.032 Okay, so we're building this game. 00:30:33.052 --> 00:30:34.152 What's the good me game? 00:30:34.592 --> 00:30:35.572 What is the premise? 00:30:35.712 --> 00:30:37.032 Well, so what? 00:30:37.032 --> 00:30:42.712 I want this to be a game where if you took the me's out of it, you just don't have a game. 00:30:42.812 --> 00:30:47.832 I want it to be fundamentally built on the fact that these are me's, but also good. 00:30:48.052 --> 00:30:52.252 So you know how the me channel is great and making me's is fun? 00:30:52.392 --> 00:30:52.972 Uh-huh. 00:30:53.372 --> 00:30:54.312 What if? 00:30:55.272 --> 00:31:07.512 What if it was a game about making me's, but it had more to it than the me channel, which it's like, oh, me channels was like, oh yeah, make these me's, whatever. 00:31:07.692 --> 00:31:08.452 Crank them out. 00:31:08.552 --> 00:31:10.992 What if the making the me's was the game? 00:31:11.012 --> 00:31:12.172 Like me factory. 00:31:12.532 --> 00:31:14.032 Me factory. 00:31:14.052 --> 00:31:15.572 Welcome to me factory. 00:31:15.652 --> 00:31:16.172 Welcome. 00:31:16.192 --> 00:31:17.232 A game about me. 00:31:17.352 --> 00:31:19.872 Welcome to, welcome to me factory. 00:31:21.472 --> 00:31:23.652 This is the voice that the main person takes. 00:31:23.672 --> 00:31:24.772 What do you do with the me's? 00:31:24.772 --> 00:31:27.232 Like you make them, and then what do you do with them? 00:31:27.892 --> 00:31:29.852 Is it like a building? 00:31:30.152 --> 00:31:30.752 In what way? 00:31:31.092 --> 00:31:32.832 What way do you think would be best? 00:31:32.852 --> 00:31:34.292 Let's build this together, Clair. 00:31:34.292 --> 00:31:34.892 Okay. 00:31:34.912 --> 00:31:39.972 What would you do with the me's that requires you to build them in particular ways? 00:31:40.012 --> 00:31:48.032 What if it was like a city builder, and you could assign every me an individual scale, so it's kind of like Sims, but better, because they're me's. 00:31:48.652 --> 00:31:50.692 Yeah, it's me Sims. 00:31:51.632 --> 00:31:52.172 But not Sims. 00:31:52.652 --> 00:31:58.452 It's me factory, yeah, but not Sims, because Sims is bad, and me is good. 00:31:58.472 --> 00:32:03.392 Sims is bad and terrible, and everyone who likes the Sims is wrong and bad. 00:32:03.672 --> 00:32:04.892 You heard it here first. 00:32:05.092 --> 00:32:06.512 We both agree with this opinion. 00:32:06.972 --> 00:32:08.892 But I think you're on to something. 00:32:08.952 --> 00:32:12.092 Yeah, so I really want to make these me's individualized. 00:32:12.452 --> 00:32:16.932 Sure, and I think like it makes you make different me's every time. 00:32:17.392 --> 00:32:20.912 And if you're gonna make more than one of the same, then they have to be twins. 00:32:21.192 --> 00:32:22.292 Now, here's an idea. 00:32:23.092 --> 00:32:25.672 What if you don't build the city? 00:32:25.932 --> 00:32:27.592 What if the me's build the city? 00:32:27.612 --> 00:32:31.832 And it depends on what me's you build on what city you get. 00:32:32.032 --> 00:32:33.072 I like that. 00:32:33.152 --> 00:32:36.212 It's like a city planner, but you only plan the citizens. 00:32:36.332 --> 00:32:42.532 Yeah, you plan the citizens, which I think just means like you make them look a certain way, and then you give them a set of stats. 00:32:43.192 --> 00:32:43.432 Oh. 00:32:43.492 --> 00:32:44.952 I think you give them a set of stats. 00:32:45.252 --> 00:32:48.312 Can we like tweak their IVs and their hidden defense? 00:32:48.332 --> 00:32:49.192 Yes, absolutely. 00:32:49.212 --> 00:32:51.852 Yes, of course, give them hidden abilities. 00:32:51.872 --> 00:32:52.592 Uh-huh. 00:32:52.652 --> 00:32:53.452 That whole thing. 00:32:53.472 --> 00:32:55.632 This one shoots spikes out of their nostrils. 00:32:55.892 --> 00:32:59.152 This one has vines out of its butt. 00:32:59.972 --> 00:33:01.172 I love Poison Ivy. 00:33:01.192 --> 00:33:04.092 Yeah, that's the Poison Ivy me. 00:33:04.112 --> 00:33:06.912 There's definitely tie-ins with existing franchises. 00:33:06.932 --> 00:33:10.732 Well, this is the best part about me is they're everybody. 00:33:10.752 --> 00:33:12.492 They're everybody. 00:33:12.512 --> 00:33:14.792 There is no IP that's safe. 00:33:14.812 --> 00:33:15.692 That's the slogan. 00:33:15.892 --> 00:33:18.392 That's the slogan, no IP is safe. 00:33:19.112 --> 00:33:23.652 How do you determine specifically what the me's are going to build? 00:33:23.672 --> 00:33:25.312 Like if you need a hospital... 00:33:25.332 --> 00:33:25.772 You don't. 00:33:26.072 --> 00:33:30.532 You just have to build enough me's that care about making medicine. 00:33:30.552 --> 00:33:32.412 How do you make me's care? 00:33:32.412 --> 00:33:35.412 You give them the attribute... 00:33:37.032 --> 00:33:37.652 Yes. 00:33:37.812 --> 00:33:43.252 You give them the attribute sick, because sick people do want to get better in general. 00:33:43.432 --> 00:33:49.532 And this definitely has no reflection on disability politics, and we don't have to consider disability politics. 00:33:49.692 --> 00:33:52.032 Me Factory is the perfect me-topia. 00:33:52.112 --> 00:33:57.772 Do you remember how Ubisoft was talking a lot of game about how all their games are non-political? 00:33:58.552 --> 00:33:58.952 What? 00:33:59.332 --> 00:34:01.112 Sorry, I want to go into this. 00:34:01.312 --> 00:34:03.272 So Ubisoft... 00:34:04.352 --> 00:34:08.952 The people in charge of Ubisoft made claims in recent... 00:34:08.972 --> 00:34:19.492 I think it was a recent interview in an article or something where they said all of their games are non-political because they are trying to ask questions, not trying to propose solutions. 00:34:20.972 --> 00:34:43.672 This includes, yes, the one we saw at E3, in which Watch Dogs 3 is a game about building a resistance movement in an authoritarian government, a version of London, in which people are trapped in cages and things are really, really bad in general, and you're trying to build a populist resistance movement, totally non-political. 00:34:43.952 --> 00:34:44.632 Yeah. 00:34:45.112 --> 00:34:45.592 So... 00:34:45.972 --> 00:34:50.612 Sorry, I'm just also thinking, didn't they also do Assassin's Creed? 00:34:50.632 --> 00:34:51.012 They did. 00:34:51.332 --> 00:34:54.892 The one that explores, like, all of history? 00:34:55.132 --> 00:34:56.052 Non-politically. 00:34:56.212 --> 00:34:57.192 Oh, yeah. 00:34:57.212 --> 00:35:02.352 You know, like, the wars of art history, like, many different wars. 00:35:02.492 --> 00:35:02.852 Yep. 00:35:03.332 --> 00:35:05.292 The apolitical wars, as they're known. 00:35:05.312 --> 00:35:06.472 The apolitical... 00:35:08.552 --> 00:35:11.032 The wars that had no impact on politics. 00:35:11.192 --> 00:35:13.832 The wars of apolitics, yes, exactly. 00:35:13.972 --> 00:35:19.612 I will say the person who's in charge of Watch Dogs 3 has come up and said, like, yeah, no, this game is political. 00:35:20.652 --> 00:35:31.432 But the people in charge of Ubisoft are really wanting to claim that their games are apolitical, which is wild, but I think we have a great opportunity here to build an apolitical city builder game. 00:35:32.312 --> 00:35:36.672 Because no one wants politics, no one wants anything to do with that. 00:35:36.692 --> 00:35:39.852 So we're putting the resistance in, and that's apolitical. 00:35:40.092 --> 00:35:43.052 I actually had a concept for a game a while back that might fit here. 00:35:43.092 --> 00:35:45.432 Okay, insert it in the factory. 00:35:45.452 --> 00:35:55.212 My concept for the game was essentially the first half of the game is this kind of resistance building game, it's like a war type game. 00:35:55.452 --> 00:36:03.552 And the first half of the game is your people trying to cause this revolution and like, topple the existing authority and install your own government. 00:36:03.732 --> 00:36:12.032 The second half of the game is you doing that government and trying to govern your city into a grand new future. 00:36:12.052 --> 00:36:18.212 No one, everyone focuses on the revolution part, no one focuses on the building a new society part. 00:36:18.272 --> 00:36:28.972 So this is great, because I've suddenly realized how to make this like co-op and friends introduce like, okay, so here's how you make a new save file of MeFactory. 00:36:29.532 --> 00:36:34.592 You start by building your MeFactory army, and you need to take a city. 00:36:34.612 --> 00:36:35.712 What city? 00:36:35.732 --> 00:36:37.852 The city your friends built. 00:36:38.672 --> 00:36:42.792 And once you take their city, you build a new city. 00:36:43.052 --> 00:36:45.792 And guess who's gonna try and take your city? 00:36:46.192 --> 00:36:47.252 It's your friends. 00:36:47.552 --> 00:36:49.972 So is there a single player mode? 00:36:50.072 --> 00:36:54.372 Yeah, there's probably generated cities off of like, you know, the internet. 00:36:54.392 --> 00:36:58.912 But this is like a constant thing where you have to hold the city against a rebellion. 00:36:58.952 --> 00:37:03.072 Yeah, I mean, that'd be an, it's like Clash of Clans, but what if Mies? 00:37:03.312 --> 00:37:04.552 Clash of Mies, okay. 00:37:04.572 --> 00:37:05.432 Clash of Mies. 00:37:05.632 --> 00:37:20.352 I would like to also say though, what if you focus on the political aspect and you get that political intrigue, you get that decision making about what way your society is gonna go, get like the, you know, what do you build out of the ashes, right? 00:37:20.372 --> 00:37:27.512 And you're not constantly worried about like, what if this was not a game that is necessarily focused on a constant rotating militarism? 00:37:27.532 --> 00:37:42.892 I mean, I was thinking, you take the city, but then, you know, that city that your save file isn't being taken, it's just a version of that gets sent to your friends, so they can take your most updated city on their save file if they want. 00:37:42.912 --> 00:37:47.092 I thought it was more along the lines of you're constantly having to look out for your friends. 00:37:47.112 --> 00:37:48.212 I did say Clash of Clans. 00:37:48.332 --> 00:37:49.592 Yes, because your friends are trying to... 00:37:49.612 --> 00:37:52.232 I didn't want Clash of Clans, but it was headed that direction. 00:37:52.272 --> 00:37:52.672 Yeah. 00:37:52.852 --> 00:37:57.052 My original idea was, where do you get these cities that you take from, right? 00:37:57.072 --> 00:37:57.692 Yeah, exactly. 00:37:57.892 --> 00:37:59.872 Well, they're probably your friends. 00:37:59.892 --> 00:38:00.792 Yeah, that makes sense. 00:38:00.812 --> 00:38:02.352 Who previously made cities. 00:38:02.372 --> 00:38:09.852 And the best part is, when you make your me's, you can be like, okay, so this me had three years of polysci and one year of physics. 00:38:10.072 --> 00:38:19.832 This me dropped out after two years of mathematics, and this me got a GED, realized that university was a crack job and just like led the revolution. 00:38:19.852 --> 00:38:21.112 I like this a lot. 00:38:21.312 --> 00:38:22.352 In the second half. 00:38:22.392 --> 00:38:23.332 So the second half. 00:38:23.712 --> 00:38:27.272 Do you still, do you like now, do you contribute me's? 00:38:27.292 --> 00:38:31.292 Like, do you get a whole new set, like way to create your me's? 00:38:31.312 --> 00:38:32.912 Like, what are the new aspects? 00:38:32.932 --> 00:38:34.592 What are the things that you can give your me's now? 00:38:34.692 --> 00:38:36.772 You couldn't previously give your me's. 00:38:36.792 --> 00:38:42.752 Well, I think, I think then it becomes more, the Sims like in that you're raising me's. 00:38:43.272 --> 00:38:43.992 Oh, okay. 00:38:44.012 --> 00:38:45.492 Because like Tomagotchi. 00:38:45.512 --> 00:38:50.792 I think like, I think the first section of the game is you're building me's to be part of this revolution. 00:38:50.812 --> 00:38:52.912 You're recruiting them, stuff like that. 00:38:52.932 --> 00:38:55.732 The second part is I think you, they fuck now. 00:38:55.932 --> 00:38:58.552 Now the me's fuck because they did the revolution. 00:38:58.632 --> 00:39:01.172 Batman and Spider-Man have sex. 00:39:01.232 --> 00:39:01.572 Yes. 00:39:01.592 --> 00:39:04.612 So first, all right, so first you do your revolution. 00:39:05.092 --> 00:39:06.412 Then you do your fucking. 00:39:07.432 --> 00:39:09.272 Then you make utopia. 00:39:09.612 --> 00:39:11.252 I think also there's like immigration. 00:39:11.272 --> 00:39:12.292 There's me immigration. 00:39:12.312 --> 00:39:13.932 There's me migration. 00:39:16.512 --> 00:39:17.592 There's me immigration. 00:39:17.992 --> 00:39:20.552 And like maybe that's like me's from your friend's cities. 00:39:20.572 --> 00:39:22.892 Your friends create me's and then they immigrate to your cities. 00:39:22.912 --> 00:39:23.552 That's fun. 00:39:23.952 --> 00:39:26.332 A lot of me's are like, you know, you're raising them. 00:39:26.352 --> 00:39:27.772 You have to think of the children. 00:39:27.792 --> 00:39:29.252 You have to build schools. 00:39:29.452 --> 00:39:36.672 So is it like Pokemon when you make one of your me's hold an ever stone, the children also gets one of the attributes of your me's? 00:39:38.252 --> 00:39:44.932 That was a weird thing because that's like a Pokemon fact that most people don't know about Pokemon. 00:39:44.952 --> 00:39:45.592 Really? 00:39:45.792 --> 00:39:52.252 Yeah, that's that's like a thing that I only think I learned like a couple of months ago because I was never that concerned about like competitive Pokemon. 00:39:52.352 --> 00:39:53.052 Yeah, my... 00:39:54.452 --> 00:39:55.892 So, but I think that that's true. 00:39:55.912 --> 00:39:59.652 I think that like, I think you can control that in that way. 00:39:59.672 --> 00:40:00.372 No, you can't. 00:40:00.592 --> 00:40:00.872 No. 00:40:00.892 --> 00:40:01.272 Sorry. 00:40:01.492 --> 00:40:10.152 The reason that you can't is because we're getting way too close to choosing like having a eugenics way to control birth. 00:40:10.172 --> 00:40:13.012 But you can make a me that wants to do that. 00:40:13.712 --> 00:40:14.912 They don't have to be good. 00:40:15.052 --> 00:40:16.612 Your me's don't have to be good people. 00:40:16.632 --> 00:40:17.112 You're right. 00:40:17.172 --> 00:40:21.072 I guess you could make a hell city in which people support eugenics. 00:40:21.092 --> 00:40:21.952 Welcome to my city. 00:40:22.172 --> 00:40:22.712 It's hell. 00:40:22.912 --> 00:40:24.152 Welcome to my city. 00:40:24.172 --> 00:40:24.652 It's hell. 00:40:24.672 --> 00:40:28.992 I guess now this is the best part because when I make hell, you get to take hell. 00:40:29.112 --> 00:40:30.512 You get to knock hell down. 00:40:31.132 --> 00:40:34.072 Now you get to break the gates of hell down. 00:40:34.312 --> 00:40:39.372 And this is when you can transfer all your me's to the Pokemon bank, then transfer them into Pokemon. 00:40:39.392 --> 00:40:41.152 Do you want to give me your last craving? 00:40:41.672 --> 00:40:44.272 No, I want to talk about that like a little bit more. 00:40:44.292 --> 00:40:46.492 Me's are in Pokemon now. 00:40:46.512 --> 00:40:49.152 Yeah, you can transfer your me's over to your new games. 00:40:49.792 --> 00:40:52.052 So the best part about me's is they're in every game now. 00:40:52.052 --> 00:40:53.152 You flood the world with me's. 00:40:53.172 --> 00:40:55.252 Oh, it's like how in Smash me's are in Smash now. 00:40:55.272 --> 00:40:56.832 So now they're in every game. 00:40:56.852 --> 00:40:57.972 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:40:58.132 --> 00:40:59.232 Me flood the world. 00:40:59.332 --> 00:41:00.452 Me flood the world. 00:41:00.632 --> 00:41:02.172 Me flood the world. 00:41:02.292 --> 00:41:03.692 Please give me your last craving. 00:41:03.852 --> 00:41:07.612 So my last craving is one about being out and about. 00:41:08.212 --> 00:41:09.512 Really, it really is. 00:41:09.532 --> 00:41:10.152 In the summer. 00:41:10.492 --> 00:41:12.872 In the summer and all the time, really. 00:41:13.292 --> 00:41:17.292 Because you know what I crave constantly when I'm out and about? 00:41:17.392 --> 00:41:17.792 Yeah. 00:41:17.932 --> 00:41:37.052 I crave the confidence of a fucking man on transit who is not aware of what is going on around him, does not give a shit about anyone else around him, is totally content to sit in the priority seating area and not think about or notice anything. 00:41:37.272 --> 00:41:49.232 Can you fathom being on public transit and not being aware of anything around you or really being in public in general and not being aware of everything around you and constantly like, oh god, what's going to happen? 00:41:49.252 --> 00:41:50.472 Oh god, I'm in public. 00:41:50.492 --> 00:41:51.612 Oh god, this is a problem. 00:41:51.932 --> 00:41:54.872 See, there's just men out there who don't think about this. 00:41:54.892 --> 00:41:58.932 And I know this because women are always the ones who get up for me when I want a seat on the bus. 00:41:59.032 --> 00:42:05.752 And basically my point is I want this confidence because I don't, I am constantly nervous. 00:42:05.772 --> 00:42:07.812 So how, how do this? 00:42:10.312 --> 00:42:11.072 It's great. 00:42:13.452 --> 00:42:15.692 It's great that you came. 00:42:15.712 --> 00:42:18.652 That was maybe a little bit intense. 00:42:18.672 --> 00:42:20.952 No, it's great because I do have the solution for you. 00:42:21.072 --> 00:42:27.852 And it's good that you came to me because I know how to have the confidence, but also like the awareness. 00:42:28.272 --> 00:42:28.772 What is it? 00:42:28.852 --> 00:42:32.112 So you do just drink a potion. 00:42:32.132 --> 00:42:34.392 Okay, well, sort of. 00:42:34.432 --> 00:42:36.092 Okay, well, potions aren't real. 00:42:36.412 --> 00:42:37.432 So what? 00:42:37.512 --> 00:42:38.832 That's rude. 00:42:43.232 --> 00:42:49.032 I can't believe you came to this podcast and you just you just shot it down. 00:42:49.052 --> 00:42:50.532 Okay, just like that. 00:42:51.092 --> 00:42:51.472 Fuck it. 00:42:51.492 --> 00:42:52.492 Potions aren't real. 00:42:52.852 --> 00:42:54.672 It's not a potion, Brianna. 00:42:55.492 --> 00:42:58.492 Listen, I just went with a real craving. 00:42:58.932 --> 00:43:02.092 That was being really genuine, and you came out here with potions. 00:43:04.652 --> 00:43:10.192 Because we've never come to the podcast with real cravings before. 00:43:10.412 --> 00:43:12.172 These are definitely all fake. 00:43:12.172 --> 00:43:13.532 Okay, okay, fine. 00:43:13.552 --> 00:43:14.792 Potions are real. 00:43:14.812 --> 00:43:15.812 No, no, no, no. 00:43:16.032 --> 00:43:17.072 Potions are fake. 00:43:17.252 --> 00:43:18.752 This is established now. 00:43:19.232 --> 00:43:20.572 Welcome to the fiction. 00:43:21.232 --> 00:43:23.452 This is how it goes. 00:43:23.472 --> 00:43:25.772 So it's not a goddamn potion. 00:43:29.232 --> 00:43:32.172 You know how in improv school, they always tell you to say no? 00:43:35.072 --> 00:43:38.612 No and no and fuck you. 00:43:40.252 --> 00:43:41.512 So potions aren't real. 00:43:41.532 --> 00:43:46.952 Potions aren't real, which is why you just need a breath mint. 00:43:48.192 --> 00:43:51.112 The secret is just a breath mint. 00:43:51.132 --> 00:43:52.972 There's nothing special. 00:43:53.172 --> 00:43:55.472 There's nothing special about this breath mint. 00:43:55.692 --> 00:43:56.932 Absolutely nothing. 00:43:57.552 --> 00:44:05.412 But if you take this breath mint and then you start blowing on the men who are in the priority seating, they'll probably move. 00:44:05.592 --> 00:44:06.392 And you know what? 00:44:06.752 --> 00:44:12.772 If you don't take the breath mint and you do this, they'll probably still move, but faster. 00:44:12.792 --> 00:44:18.432 I think you've misunderstood the part of this that I want. 00:44:18.752 --> 00:44:19.772 You want the seat. 00:44:20.472 --> 00:44:22.612 Well, yes, obviously. 00:44:22.852 --> 00:44:25.792 I think that's probably something that I deserve. 00:44:26.552 --> 00:44:28.072 But I want the confidence. 00:44:28.232 --> 00:44:29.432 Because I just can't... 00:44:29.452 --> 00:44:31.032 Well, this is what the breath mint gives you. 00:44:31.192 --> 00:44:38.092 You're confident that when you blow on this person, they're not going to be like, oh, God, that breath is horrible. 00:44:38.192 --> 00:44:41.592 They're like, oh, no, I'm being blown on out of... 00:44:41.752 --> 00:44:42.752 This is my fault. 00:44:42.772 --> 00:44:43.392 Oh, no. 00:44:44.292 --> 00:44:48.492 And then they shrink into nothingness, and you have won. 00:44:48.992 --> 00:44:50.592 You are the confidence now. 00:44:50.772 --> 00:44:51.952 The breath mint has become you. 00:44:51.972 --> 00:44:53.212 Wait, you've taken their confidence? 00:44:53.232 --> 00:44:56.112 You absorb their confidence by blowing on them. 00:44:56.132 --> 00:44:58.132 Okay, now I'm with it. 00:44:58.132 --> 00:45:03.852 See, I was going to say that maybe we should try to invent some potions, because the breath mint idea was a little... 00:45:03.872 --> 00:45:05.292 It was bad, too, Brianna. 00:45:05.592 --> 00:45:08.292 Potions aren't real, and my idea is bad. 00:45:09.292 --> 00:45:10.312 Well, now it's... 00:45:10.512 --> 00:45:12.772 It's a podcast where Clair is wrong. 00:45:12.792 --> 00:45:16.132 Well, now it's a good idea. 00:45:16.152 --> 00:45:19.072 Well, now it's a very good idea. 00:45:19.172 --> 00:45:23.852 Because I didn't realize that when you blow on someone, you take their strength... 00:45:24.312 --> 00:45:25.892 Their confidence, specifically. 00:45:25.912 --> 00:45:27.192 You take their confidence. 00:45:28.592 --> 00:45:31.072 Wow, I have their confidence now. 00:45:31.132 --> 00:45:34.572 And they become like jerky or whatever, and you put them in your pocket for later. 00:45:37.272 --> 00:45:37.992 Little snack. 00:45:39.932 --> 00:45:41.092 Is that murder? 00:45:41.652 --> 00:45:42.852 No, it's jerky. 00:45:42.872 --> 00:45:45.292 Because they were a jerk. 00:45:45.292 --> 00:45:47.832 There you go. 00:45:47.852 --> 00:45:48.212 You got it. 00:45:48.412 --> 00:45:52.472 But no, yeah, I think that this is a good idea, because I would like to absorb the confidence. 00:45:53.012 --> 00:45:53.452 Yeah. 00:45:53.572 --> 00:45:55.692 Yeah, so you just sort of absorb their confidence. 00:45:55.712 --> 00:45:57.152 What happens to them after that? 00:45:57.512 --> 00:45:59.012 I told you, jerky. 00:45:59.472 --> 00:46:00.612 You put them in your pocket. 00:46:00.852 --> 00:46:02.712 So they actually just become jerky. 00:46:02.732 --> 00:46:03.432 They're yours now. 00:46:03.452 --> 00:46:04.572 And this isn't murder? 00:46:05.012 --> 00:46:07.672 It's, like I said, it's jerky. 00:46:07.692 --> 00:46:08.732 Are you sure? 00:46:10.412 --> 00:46:12.392 Can they become a person again? 00:46:12.412 --> 00:46:13.992 I guess if you water them. 00:46:14.112 --> 00:46:18.772 So if you wring the big sponge blanket out over them, yes. 00:46:19.172 --> 00:46:19.992 They'll rehydrate. 00:46:20.012 --> 00:46:21.052 Will they have their confidence? 00:46:21.972 --> 00:46:22.872 They'll have water. 00:46:22.972 --> 00:46:23.892 They'll have chlorine. 00:46:24.052 --> 00:46:26.332 Their chlorine fills in where their confidence was. 00:46:26.632 --> 00:46:29.312 And if you blow on them again, do you take the chlorine? 00:46:30.552 --> 00:46:31.852 I think it's no, it's like... 00:46:31.872 --> 00:46:36.392 What I'm saying here is I really would like an infinite confidence generator. 00:46:36.412 --> 00:46:42.152 Oh, well, okay, but that's dangerous, because you know what they say about having too much confidence? 00:46:42.632 --> 00:46:43.032 What? 00:46:43.392 --> 00:46:44.252 You're gonna... 00:46:44.272 --> 00:46:45.492 you're gonna... 00:46:45.952 --> 00:46:46.372 rude. 00:46:46.712 --> 00:46:48.532 I love that famous saying. 00:46:49.232 --> 00:46:51.432 If you have too much confidence, you're gonna... 00:46:53.892 --> 00:46:54.312 rude. 00:46:55.612 --> 00:47:00.952 That's my favorite saying after you are something. 00:47:01.552 --> 00:47:02.112 Eat! 00:47:02.292 --> 00:47:08.472 Can we come up with some other sayings now? 00:47:08.512 --> 00:47:10.792 Or sorry, can we talk about some other sayings now? 00:47:10.812 --> 00:47:12.492 Because I think that they're really interesting. 00:47:12.512 --> 00:47:14.572 Like, maybe... 00:47:14.592 --> 00:47:15.952 You got too much jerky? 00:47:16.092 --> 00:47:17.812 Not with this sponge. 00:47:18.752 --> 00:47:21.312 You take your... 00:47:21.332 --> 00:47:21.652 thing. 00:47:21.672 --> 00:47:22.712 Towel. 00:47:22.892 --> 00:47:24.152 Big sponge. 00:47:24.712 --> 00:47:25.412 Towel. 00:47:25.692 --> 00:47:26.832 Where does it all go? 00:47:28.132 --> 00:47:30.052 When you nail it once, you nail it twice. 00:47:30.372 --> 00:47:31.972 Really thinks you make. 00:47:32.632 --> 00:47:33.192 Yeah. 00:47:33.792 --> 00:47:34.492 That's the saying. 00:47:34.512 --> 00:47:35.272 It's just yeah. 00:47:37.112 --> 00:47:39.832 Okay, so what if I didn't want to turn anyone into jerky? 00:47:40.412 --> 00:47:41.672 Okay, why not? 00:47:45.512 --> 00:47:46.452 I just want to know. 00:47:48.372 --> 00:47:49.212 What's your hold up? 00:47:49.252 --> 00:47:52.512 I'm not thrilled with the murder aspect. 00:47:52.532 --> 00:47:53.072 It's not. 00:47:53.312 --> 00:47:56.592 Okay, for the third time, it's not murder. 00:47:59.772 --> 00:48:03.112 Right, but you're making a living person into jerky. 00:48:04.632 --> 00:48:09.832 No, the issue is the jerky, I don't think it counts as a person. 00:48:10.272 --> 00:48:10.852 That's rude. 00:48:11.052 --> 00:48:12.092 Now, that's rude. 00:48:13.452 --> 00:48:13.972 Why? 00:48:13.972 --> 00:48:14.832 Can it think? 00:48:16.472 --> 00:48:19.752 Wow, wow, I can't believe you just come out here. 00:48:19.772 --> 00:48:20.992 Can it think, Clair? 00:48:21.012 --> 00:48:22.012 You come out here. 00:48:23.872 --> 00:48:25.472 This is an interrogation. 00:48:26.352 --> 00:48:29.532 You come out here with your anti-jerky viewpoints. 00:48:32.052 --> 00:48:33.972 Of course, the jerky can think. 00:48:34.052 --> 00:48:35.492 Now, can it talk? 00:48:36.012 --> 00:48:37.632 That's another question. 00:48:38.192 --> 00:48:43.332 Listen, I'm just anti-SJW, social jerky warriors. 00:48:43.352 --> 00:48:49.432 Okay, but my main concern is, I don't necessarily want to take away someone's ability to speak. 00:48:49.672 --> 00:48:51.392 What if I support free speech? 00:48:52.072 --> 00:48:53.852 But you do want to take away their confidence. 00:48:54.132 --> 00:48:56.312 No, Clair, you want to take away their confidence. 00:48:56.512 --> 00:49:00.952 What I want is to have something resembling that confidence. 00:49:01.052 --> 00:49:05.872 I don't necessarily want to suck all of their confidence away from them. 00:49:05.892 --> 00:49:08.492 You seemed pretty ecstatic about that idea. 00:49:09.552 --> 00:49:10.712 You're right. 00:49:10.732 --> 00:49:17.032 I guess I got ahead of myself and was very, very quickly prepared to jerkify them. 00:49:17.732 --> 00:49:19.452 Is that the name of the process? 00:49:19.532 --> 00:49:19.892 Yep. 00:49:20.952 --> 00:49:21.372 Okay. 00:49:21.392 --> 00:49:23.452 You're just jerking them around? 00:49:23.692 --> 00:49:24.052 Nope. 00:49:25.852 --> 00:49:34.872 Would you say that when you turn them to jerky, it's jerking on, and when you make them no longer jerky, it's jerking off? 00:49:35.352 --> 00:49:36.692 You could say that. 00:49:37.012 --> 00:49:38.552 I think that's the same. 00:49:38.572 --> 00:49:39.652 Yeah, okay. 00:49:39.752 --> 00:49:42.132 Jerk on, jerk off. 00:49:46.892 --> 00:49:49.092 Well, I guess that's the only solution I need. 00:49:49.192 --> 00:49:50.752 Yeah, it really is. 00:49:51.392 --> 00:49:52.832 So you feeling confident now? 00:49:52.852 --> 00:49:54.012 I'm feeling something. 00:49:54.552 --> 00:49:55.432 That's the jerky. 00:49:57.612 --> 00:49:57.992 Great. 00:49:58.012 --> 00:49:58.992 It's me and the jerky. 00:49:59.232 --> 00:50:00.492 Love that foley. 00:50:00.612 --> 00:50:02.072 Describe the taste, please. 00:50:02.252 --> 00:50:05.052 Well, it tastes like thoughts. 00:50:05.772 --> 00:50:07.992 It tastes like the thoughts of the jerky. 00:50:08.412 --> 00:50:09.332 What are those? 00:50:09.452 --> 00:50:10.492 Oh God, I'm in pain. 00:50:10.512 --> 00:50:11.872 Oh God, oh God, oh God. 00:50:11.932 --> 00:50:12.872 This is horrible. 00:50:12.892 --> 00:50:13.712 This is terrible. 00:50:13.732 --> 00:50:14.552 This is murder. 00:50:14.572 --> 00:50:16.272 This is murder. 00:50:17.652 --> 00:50:19.472 I'm just saying what the jerky is thinking. 00:50:20.192 --> 00:50:21.672 And it's thinking this is murder. 00:50:21.972 --> 00:50:25.392 It can be wrong, but it does feel a little bit, especially if you keep it jerky. 00:50:25.412 --> 00:50:26.132 Well, you know what? 00:50:26.312 --> 00:50:27.372 You know what, Brianna? 00:50:27.572 --> 00:50:30.292 Jerky is always wrong, and it's rude. 00:50:30.632 --> 00:50:32.272 I mean, yeah, I can't argue with that. 00:50:32.292 --> 00:50:33.872 Yeah, no end. 00:50:34.152 --> 00:50:35.592 Do you want to give me an outro? 00:50:37.152 --> 00:50:38.772 Is that how we describe this now? 00:50:41.832 --> 00:50:47.112 Yeah, let's let's cruise off into the yeah. 00:50:47.412 --> 00:50:51.612 Jerky stocks are rising as are the waves this summer. 00:51:02.212 --> 00:51:04.092 Right around the beginning of summer, in fact. 00:51:04.172 --> 00:51:12.732 Right around the beginning of summer, what if you want to beat the heat by staying inside linked to your computer or maybe your PS4 if you could access YouTube on it? 00:51:14.072 --> 00:51:18.472 So what we're doing, we mentioned this last week, we're gonna bring it up again. 00:51:18.492 --> 00:51:19.232 We have a date. 00:51:19.412 --> 00:51:24.432 We have a date now of the Salt Cravings one year anniversary live stream. 00:51:24.432 --> 00:51:25.312 Oh, God, please come. 00:51:25.332 --> 00:51:26.192 Oh, God, please come. 00:51:26.212 --> 00:51:26.932 That's the name. 00:51:27.532 --> 00:51:28.552 That's what we're calling it. 00:51:28.812 --> 00:51:33.412 And it is June 29th at 1 p.m. 00:51:33.572 --> 00:51:37.092 There will be a link to our YouTube channel in the episode description. 00:51:37.112 --> 00:51:38.072 Please go check it out there. 00:51:38.092 --> 00:51:42.452 Yeah, YouTube doesn't actually let us like name our YouTube channel, apparently. 00:51:42.472 --> 00:51:42.692 Yeah. 00:51:42.792 --> 00:51:44.092 Until we have a hundred subscribers. 00:51:44.552 --> 00:51:47.192 So, I mean, feel free if you want to. 00:51:47.212 --> 00:51:49.292 It's really just going to be live shows. 00:51:49.312 --> 00:51:49.652 Yeah. 00:51:49.792 --> 00:51:51.312 You're not going to get spammed, we promise. 00:51:51.312 --> 00:51:54.772 We do promise, unless until we start our vlogs, you know. 00:51:54.832 --> 00:51:55.652 No, no. 00:51:56.012 --> 00:52:01.212 But we are doing this live stream, and we would love to have people come out and participate. 00:52:01.752 --> 00:52:03.112 And get to like... 00:52:03.312 --> 00:52:05.872 Normally, we're like, send in your cravings. 00:52:06.192 --> 00:52:07.712 Don't send in your cravings. 00:52:08.092 --> 00:52:08.712 Save them. 00:52:08.852 --> 00:52:11.072 And then come to the live cravings cast. 00:52:11.092 --> 00:52:16.272 And if you aren't going to be able to make it, I mean, it is a Saturday at 1 p.m., but everyone works when they work, right? 00:52:16.272 --> 00:52:19.952 We tried to make it as Saturday-y as possible. 00:52:19.972 --> 00:52:24.012 As Saturday-y as possible, but I work in a live theater, so I totally get it. 00:52:24.032 --> 00:52:25.312 Versus a dead theater. 00:52:25.452 --> 00:52:26.672 Yeah, a dead theater. 00:52:26.692 --> 00:52:27.512 You know, a movie theater. 00:52:27.932 --> 00:52:28.592 Night of the Living Dead. 00:52:28.692 --> 00:52:29.712 Yeah, Night of the Living Dead. 00:52:29.912 --> 00:52:34.332 If you can't make it, do send in your cravings ahead of time, and we will talk about them in the live episode. 00:52:34.352 --> 00:52:40.312 We will release the live episode into the feed, and we are really, really hoping it's going to turn out well. 00:52:40.532 --> 00:52:42.092 Please, please prove us right. 00:52:43.172 --> 00:52:49.612 I mean, if not, it sucks, but you'll get to listen to it after, and you'll get to tell us. 00:52:49.872 --> 00:52:50.572 Basically. 00:52:50.592 --> 00:52:56.992 Yeah, you can tell us how you feel about it on social media at Salt Cravings on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. 00:52:56.992 --> 00:53:00.592 Where we will also be posting the links to our YouTube. 00:53:00.612 --> 00:53:01.892 Yeah, those will also be there. 00:53:02.252 --> 00:53:05.232 And if you like us, you can... 00:53:05.252 --> 00:53:06.952 Or if you don't like us, but we... 00:53:07.432 --> 00:53:09.972 I mean, if you don't like us, why are you listening? 00:53:10.592 --> 00:53:11.592 You made it this far. 00:53:11.612 --> 00:53:13.212 This is episode 26. 00:53:13.232 --> 00:53:17.592 Yeah, even if this is the first episode you're listening to, you made an entire episode. 00:53:17.612 --> 00:53:19.412 Like, wow, wow. 00:53:19.432 --> 00:53:20.772 Congratulations. 00:53:20.792 --> 00:53:21.772 You did so well. 00:53:21.952 --> 00:53:23.792 So well, so well. 00:53:23.912 --> 00:53:24.952 You listened to this. 00:53:25.072 --> 00:53:28.932 Yeah, but you can go give us a review on iTunes and Google Play. 00:53:28.932 --> 00:53:30.732 I don't know if Google Play does reviews. 00:53:30.752 --> 00:53:31.632 We were looking into this. 00:53:31.712 --> 00:53:33.412 I'm not sure they do reviews and ratings. 00:53:33.472 --> 00:53:34.812 Well, go rate us on iTunes. 00:53:34.892 --> 00:53:36.172 Go rate us on iTunes. 00:53:36.192 --> 00:53:42.172 Tell your friends, hey, if you're in Google Play and you don't have access to iTunes, tell your friends, tell the people around you, you know. 00:53:42.172 --> 00:53:49.392 If you wanna, like, I mean, if you think we're good, if you're listening to us and you don't think we're good, why, like, seriously, like, go consume media. 00:53:49.412 --> 00:53:50.772 We cannot emphasize this enough. 00:53:50.792 --> 00:53:51.912 We cannot emphasize this enough. 00:53:51.932 --> 00:53:54.492 Like, go consume media that you enjoy. 00:53:54.512 --> 00:53:57.292 Like, don't listen to media just because it's media. 00:53:57.312 --> 00:54:01.512 But if you do enjoy our media, other people around you may also enjoy it. 00:54:01.532 --> 00:54:05.652 And so what we're asking is, you know, go talk to your friends about it. 00:54:05.672 --> 00:54:06.832 Recommend it to people. 00:54:07.452 --> 00:54:08.572 We would love to... 00:54:08.752 --> 00:54:10.172 We think we're funny somehow. 00:54:10.292 --> 00:54:19.312 We think we're funny somehow, and we would love to have everyone involved and, you know, get more people, particularly for the livestream. 00:54:19.652 --> 00:54:21.472 I cannot emphasize enough. 00:54:21.492 --> 00:54:23.372 I'm begging you, please come to our livestream. 00:54:23.392 --> 00:54:24.192 Please come, oh come. 00:54:27.192 --> 00:54:27.952 That's what it's called. 00:54:28.012 --> 00:54:28.812 Please come, oh come. 00:54:29.012 --> 00:54:29.492 Oh come. 00:54:29.752 --> 00:54:30.312 Oh come. 00:54:30.592 --> 00:54:31.112 Oh come. 00:54:31.672 --> 00:54:32.752 Oh come.