SPEAKER_2: Hello, everyone, and welcome to the Late Show with Salt Cravings.
SPEAKER_2: I'm your host, Brianna.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, it is just the most wonderful night here on this Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday night.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, we are so excited.
SPEAKER_2: And I'll tell you, I'll tell you why we're excited today.
SPEAKER_2: Today we have just this, we have an incredible guest today.
SPEAKER_2: I'm so excited.
SPEAKER_2: You love her, I love her, we all love her.
SPEAKER_2: Please welcome our guest, Clair.
SPEAKER_1: Hi, thanks for welcoming me.
SPEAKER_1: I've never been on this show before, so I'm really excited to learn why people actually listen to it.
SPEAKER_2: I am so, I'm so excited to show you why people actually listen to it.
SPEAKER_2: Ha ha ha ha ha.
SPEAKER_2: Did you just laugh, Trak?
SPEAKER_2: That was the live studio audience we were filming in front of, of course, on this, the Late Show with Salt Cravings.
SPEAKER_2: So tell me, Clair, you know, you've got a lot of projects going on, of course, as we know.
SPEAKER_2: Why would you call me out like this?
SPEAKER_2: Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_2: Do you want to tell us about what you're working on right now?
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, I'm working on, it's actually a biopic.
SPEAKER_1: It's about this girl who takes on too many projects and then never finishes any of them and instead just starts like 50 different projects.
SPEAKER_1: And eventually they all come to a head.
SPEAKER_1: And there's a whole thing.
SPEAKER_1: There's like a subplot about magical girl stuff and there's another universe where she has to save it as well.
SPEAKER_1: And then ultimately her friendships all end because she has made too many commitments that she can't uphold.
SPEAKER_1: And her life comes to an end at the very beginning, actually.
SPEAKER_2: It's about her ghost.
SPEAKER_2: That's quite a setup for a movie.
SPEAKER_2: And so tell me, when is that one coming out?
SPEAKER_1: Yesterday, actually.
SPEAKER_1: It went right to on demand.
SPEAKER_1: I don't know if theaters didn't want this one.
SPEAKER_2: I should have known that.
SPEAKER_1: So do you just push a button or like, how do you...
SPEAKER_2: Look out at the audience, Clair.
SPEAKER_2: Don't you see the live studio audience today for our show today?
SPEAKER_2: You have to be cool.
SPEAKER_2: You have to make them believe that there's a live studio audience.
SPEAKER_1: I mean, look, if you can't make me believe that there's a live studio audience, how am I supposed to believe that they believe that there's a live studio audience, right?
SPEAKER_1: It's all like, I'm an actor, but you got to give me something to work with.
SPEAKER_2: Of course, of course.
SPEAKER_2: No, very, very, very funny.
SPEAKER_2: We're just going to go to commercial.
SPEAKER_2: And when we come back, let's start with your first craving.
SPEAKER_2: OK, that was the cut to commercial.
SPEAKER_2: So now no one can hear us.
SPEAKER_2: So what's your first craving going to be?
SPEAKER_1: Oh, wait, are we just going to are we not going to talk about it on the show?
SPEAKER_1: Are we going to just cut back?
SPEAKER_2: Tell me it and then I'll and then I'll I'll bring us back in.
SPEAKER_2: I just want to know how to, you know, how to how to get us back in.
SPEAKER_2: Great.
SPEAKER_1: I mean, I've just been really craving having a goddamn memory.
SPEAKER_2: That's that's a really good craving.
SPEAKER_2: All right.
SPEAKER_2: Let me let me let me just bring us bring us in.
SPEAKER_2: All right.
SPEAKER_2: Hey, everyone, we are back and we are just ready to start out with with Claire's first first craving here today.
SPEAKER_2: Now, Clair, tell me, what do you remember about what your craving is?
SPEAKER_1: Uh, God, we just talked about this, didn't we?
SPEAKER_1: Like, I just told you, did we?
SPEAKER_1: I thought I told you what my craving was.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, no, no, no, no.
SPEAKER_2: And no, you you have it on the show yet on the show that we're on.
SPEAKER_2: Said what the craving is.
SPEAKER_1: Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_1: Um, yeah, I've just been really craving having I can't put my finger on it.
SPEAKER_1: Um, can you help?
SPEAKER_2: Yeah.
SPEAKER_2: Well, what you were saying to me before the show started backstage, of course, was you were saying that it was about memory and wanting to have a memory.
SPEAKER_1: Why would I say memory?
SPEAKER_1: I have perfect memory.
SPEAKER_2: So tell me, Clair, uh, how?
SPEAKER_2: OK, so so your craving is having a goddamn memory.
SPEAKER_1: Did I say that?
SPEAKER_2: You can't keep throwing those jokes.
SPEAKER_1: You're the one who keeps going with the bit.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, because my bit was the funniest bit we've ever done on this show of all time.
SPEAKER_2: The best bit we've ever done.
SPEAKER_2: It was an all time bit.
SPEAKER_2: It's going to when someone makes the best of Salt Cravings, it's the one of them is going to be that time that Brianna pretended she was the host of a late night talk show.
SPEAKER_1: Soon you're just going to be up there with like Kimmy Smedal or whatever.
SPEAKER_1: What's that guy's name?
SPEAKER_2: I believe you're thinking of you're thinking of Jimmy John.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah.
SPEAKER_2: Fergie.
SPEAKER_1: Fergie has her own like late night show.
SPEAKER_2: I don't know.
SPEAKER_2: Jimmy John Fergie.
SPEAKER_1: Oh, I didn't realize Fergie was her family name.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah.
SPEAKER_1: Well, of course, she's she's that's so like formal.
SPEAKER_1: Imagine like becoming an amazing celebrity and then going by your last name.
SPEAKER_2: That'd be a little weird.
SPEAKER_2: It's very especially brave for the two of us because of our last names being Ross and Price.
SPEAKER_1: What if we only introduce ourselves as Ross and Price now?
SPEAKER_2: OK, so we're going to do the whole bit from the beginning.
SPEAKER_2: This time, I'm only going to call yourself Price and I'm going to call you Ross.
SPEAKER_2: And that's going to go from the top.
SPEAKER_1: Three, two, one, break.
SPEAKER_1: How do we get a goddamn memory?
SPEAKER_2: What if we were to simply...
SPEAKER_1: Write things down.
SPEAKER_2: No, that's...
SPEAKER_2: No, that doesn't work.
SPEAKER_2: Trust me, I've been there.
SPEAKER_2: So we all hate Harry Potter.
SPEAKER_2: But there is that moment when one of them puts their memories in a memory pool.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, we did talk about that last time.
SPEAKER_2: We did talk about that last time.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, I was wondering when that had come up.
SPEAKER_2: We've never done a memory-related craving before, right?
SPEAKER_2: Have we?
SPEAKER_1: I'm almost certainly not sure.
SPEAKER_1: Honestly, I'm almost certainly not sure.
SPEAKER_1: That is the answer.
SPEAKER_1: If I had a memory, I could tell you, but I do not, so...
SPEAKER_2: Yep, and you know what?
SPEAKER_2: If we have, it's kind of funny, isn't it, that we can't remember?
SPEAKER_1: It's a little funny.
SPEAKER_2: Clearly our last go at this craving didn't work super well since we can't remember whether we've done it before or not.
SPEAKER_2: So maybe we need a new solution.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, so what if we were to...
SPEAKER_2: You know how they talk about downloading more RAM?
SPEAKER_1: I do know the joke of downloading more RAM, yes?
SPEAKER_2: Yes, the way that you download more RAM, a thing that you can totally do.
SPEAKER_1: Right.
SPEAKER_2: So what if you could download more RAM into your brain?
SPEAKER_1: So you're...
SPEAKER_1: Okay, so I do have a question about this.
SPEAKER_1: I think the better equivalency, not to be the pedantic computer nerd, but is to have an extra hard drive.
SPEAKER_2: But Clair, think about it.
SPEAKER_2: Wouldn't you like to be able to randomly access your memory?
SPEAKER_2: I'm sure you would love to be able to access your memory randomly at any time you need.
SPEAKER_1: The biggest question is, is this an internal or an external memory?
SPEAKER_1: Can I unhook this memory or is this something that's built into my brain?
SPEAKER_2: I think it's whatever you want.
SPEAKER_2: Would you rather have it built in or would you rather have a place where you can store memories?
SPEAKER_1: It is a little hard because if you did build it in, it would probably just be screwed on to your head.
SPEAKER_1: And also, I'm getting intense flashbacks now to a memory hat that we might have created, which does just sound very us first and foremost.
SPEAKER_1: But also is a great solution to this.
SPEAKER_2: Perhaps we've already done this one.
SPEAKER_1: I think we might have arrived at this conclusion in a different way.
SPEAKER_1: But instead of an external solution, like a memory hat, which who knows, maybe you can just get a lovely sun hat, and it's actually just made out of brain, but it looks like a sun hat, and it just extends your brain capacity.
SPEAKER_1: What would that feel like?
SPEAKER_1: Do you think it would dry out in the sun?
SPEAKER_1: Probably wouldn't last in the sun.
SPEAKER_2: Maybe that's why it has to be inside you.
SPEAKER_2: What if we were to just start replacing unnecessary organs in your body with more brain?
SPEAKER_1: All right, can you list some unnecessary organs for me, Brianna?
SPEAKER_2: Appendix.
SPEAKER_1: Not unnecessary, we learned.
SPEAKER_2: Appendix.
SPEAKER_2: Appendix unnecessary.
SPEAKER_2: Liver, who needs it?
SPEAKER_2: You got two of them, I think.
SPEAKER_2: Fuck it.
SPEAKER_2: Brain intestines.
SPEAKER_1: Sorry, what?
SPEAKER_2: Brain intestines.
SPEAKER_1: What are those?
SPEAKER_1: What is a brain intestine?
SPEAKER_2: You take intestines and you convert it into a brain.
SPEAKER_1: Oh, I thought you were saying this is something we already had, and I was very concerned.
SPEAKER_1: I think you were shitting out of...
SPEAKER_1: I mean, they do kind of just look like brains already.
SPEAKER_2: True, they do, so you're pretty close.
SPEAKER_2: I mean, if you think about it, you don't need most of the organs in your body.
SPEAKER_2: They can all kind of be replaced with brains.
SPEAKER_1: We could just sort of reroute the digestive system, you know, like instead of a complex series of tubes that internally take in the nutrition, what we can do is we can kind of just have it stop at the stomach.
SPEAKER_1: Now, if we give every person sort of like a cremation stomach, have you ever seen a cremator, how it just gets really, really, really hot, and basically the only things left are like bones?
SPEAKER_1: We don't usually eat bones, so I think we'll be good if we just change our stomach into, you know, like a cremation oven, and then we just sort of use the rest of the space for bottom brain.
SPEAKER_2: Right.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, I think that that makes sense to me.
SPEAKER_1: So that feels like the easy part, right?
SPEAKER_1: Like converting the intestines in the brain.
SPEAKER_1: They already kind of just look like brains, like I mean, I'm sure science has already figured it out.
SPEAKER_1: I'm, you know, I'm going to just assume that's a yes.
SPEAKER_1: I think what about like cremation stomach?
SPEAKER_1: How are we going to make that a reality?
SPEAKER_1: Right.
SPEAKER_1: Because that can get pretty hot.
SPEAKER_1: Because once we solve that, everything else just falls into place.
SPEAKER_2: So the first thing that you need is a way to heat proof it so that it doesn't burn up the rest of you.
SPEAKER_2: So we need some heat proof shielding to go around it.
SPEAKER_2: And that heat proof shielding also has to be totally cool with like being in your body.
SPEAKER_1: There's like those bacteria that live near hot vents at the bottom of the ocean.
SPEAKER_1: What if we made a bacteria wall?
SPEAKER_1: What if we put more bacteria in your stomach?
SPEAKER_1: I figured out the perfect biologically sound and totally normal solution.
SPEAKER_2: Extra bacteria.
SPEAKER_1: Extra bacteria.
SPEAKER_1: We're just gonna make a snack that you can eat that's gonna turn your stomach into an irrefutable fire machine.
SPEAKER_1: And not only is this great for, you know, digestion, it basically means you can eat whatever you want except bones.
SPEAKER_1: I just need to make that very clear.
SPEAKER_1: Do not eat bones.
SPEAKER_2: Or bone-like substances.
SPEAKER_1: Oh, wait.
SPEAKER_2: It's gotta be multiple.
SPEAKER_1: No, you can eat bones.
SPEAKER_1: I've changed my mind.
SPEAKER_1: You can absolutely eat bones.
SPEAKER_1: We're just gonna have to learn how to eat like an owl.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, tell me a little bit more about eating like an owl.
SPEAKER_1: Have you ever dissected the pellets that owls cough up?
SPEAKER_1: No.
SPEAKER_2: Really?
SPEAKER_1: So owls will eat the animal whole, usually a mouse, and then they will digest all of the edible parts, and then they will cough back up the bones and fur.
SPEAKER_2: So yeah, you could totally do that.
SPEAKER_2: We are just gonna have to learn to be more owl-like.
SPEAKER_2: And also, if you think about it...
SPEAKER_1: It's more cat-like, too.
SPEAKER_1: We're just one step closer to cat boys and cat girls.
SPEAKER_1: That's what I'm proposing.
SPEAKER_2: Or owl boys and owl girls and owl non-binary people, of course.
SPEAKER_2: Because the thing that I'm thinking about it is what's wiser than an owl, right?
SPEAKER_2: You're already wanting to be wiser and know more things and to remember more things.
SPEAKER_2: So you're basically already trying to be more like an owl.
SPEAKER_1: What if we just fuse with owls?
SPEAKER_1: What if we just become owl people?
SPEAKER_2: I like this idea.
SPEAKER_2: So tell me, can you just tell me a little bit about how we're going to fuse with owls?
SPEAKER_1: Inject the DNA.
SPEAKER_2: So, and then from there, will it just transform us?
SPEAKER_1: Well, no.
SPEAKER_1: I mean, we've already gone through multiple instances of puberty.
SPEAKER_1: Really, we just need a third puberty, owl puberty.
SPEAKER_2: Losing it over the assumed we of this is only, I'm only talking to trans people who've gone through a second puberty.
SPEAKER_1: Well, I was actually just talking to you and me.
SPEAKER_1: But yes, if you haven't gone through a second puberty, why are you even here?
SPEAKER_1: Only people who have gone through two puberties are valid.
SPEAKER_2: Some people are trans and have only gone through one puberty, and they're also valid.
SPEAKER_1: Hey, it doesn't matter if you're trans and haven't gone through two puberties, and if you're cis and have gone through two puberties.
SPEAKER_1: You know, I said what I said.
SPEAKER_1: You know, two puberties are GTFO.
SPEAKER_2: I would like to distance myself from problematic Clair Ross.
SPEAKER_2: I am just saying, you know, I didn't know that she held these opinions.
SPEAKER_2: I didn't know that that Clair was a true scum.
SPEAKER_1: But no, no, no, I'm not saying anything about like, God, what are other true scum binary people aren't real.
SPEAKER_1: Right, right, right.
SPEAKER_2: Also, I guess it would more be transmed than true scum anyway.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, it'd be like it'd be like a sub portion of transmed.
SPEAKER_1: I've created a new sub transmedicalism where, yeah, trans people are valid, including non-binary people, but only if they've gone through two puberties.
SPEAKER_1: I don't even care how they've gone through two puberties.
SPEAKER_1: I don't even care if it's the same puberty.
SPEAKER_1: If you've done it twice, that's fine.
SPEAKER_2: The only people who are valid are the ones who've gone through two puberties, and we're not here to define what second puberty looks like.
SPEAKER_2: But a third puberty, an owl puberty here, that's a good idea.
SPEAKER_2: I think one day you just wake up and there's some feathers, and that's just part of your new state.
SPEAKER_1: I mean, have you seen baby owls?
SPEAKER_1: Their feathers are really, really...
SPEAKER_1: They start out very...
SPEAKER_1: I don't want to say slimy, because that's not correct.
SPEAKER_1: But also, what if they started out slimy?
SPEAKER_2: So it's not actually that you're noticing feathers, it's just that you start noticing slime on your skin, which is very similar to a lot of puberties.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, and then...
SPEAKER_1: I think they're sliming and sprouting and hardening, all the things that come with most puberties.
SPEAKER_2: And slowly but surely, you start to become an owl person.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah.
SPEAKER_2: And also, your brain just gets huge and brilliant because of your wisdom that you've acquired by being an owl person.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah.
SPEAKER_2: You start to remember everything.
SPEAKER_2: You remember everything.
SPEAKER_2: Actually, we should have gone with elephants for this because elephants never forget.
SPEAKER_1: It's too late.
SPEAKER_1: We can't go back.
SPEAKER_1: I've already started injecting myself.
SPEAKER_2: Taking owl injections.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, excellent.
SPEAKER_1: I take them owl-y.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, I'm in such immense pain.
SPEAKER_2: It's the owl juice.
SPEAKER_1: I'm owl about this craving.
SPEAKER_1: Do you want to move on?
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, I think we can.
SPEAKER_2: You know what?
SPEAKER_2: I'm just going to go ahead and take us out of the body horror zone, which I've probably put a content warning in here for body horror, just to warn people.
SPEAKER_2: And hey, welcome back from that.
SPEAKER_2: And now for my craving.
SPEAKER_2: I need to know.
SPEAKER_2: Now here's what I need to know.
SPEAKER_2: Which games in the big bundle are good?
SPEAKER_2: So for those who aren't gamers or don't know games at all, you may not be aware.
SPEAKER_1: What is a game, Brianna?
SPEAKER_2: A miserable little pile of secrets.
SPEAKER_2: But enough talk.
SPEAKER_2: I lost you.
SPEAKER_2: itch.io, which is a game platform, both for video games and tabletop games.
SPEAKER_1: Mainly.
SPEAKER_2: It did recently this huge bundle.
SPEAKER_2: It ended up having like 1700 games in it.
SPEAKER_1: Jesus, that went up so much more.
SPEAKER_2: It sure did.
SPEAKER_2: And it has a whole bunch of games in it that are of different genres or different creators.
SPEAKER_2: And it was a bundle that was selling these games and then donating to various charities to support racial justice and equity.
SPEAKER_2: And so basically they sold this bundle.
SPEAKER_2: And I obviously got this bundle because it's incredible.
SPEAKER_2: It's a lot of games.
SPEAKER_2: And there's a couple of games that are like, oh yeah, fairly well known, like Night in the Woods, Celeste is in there.
SPEAKER_2: There's a whole bunch of good games in there.
SPEAKER_2: I, you know, the bundle is unfortunately over at this point, but you know, if you picked it up, I would definitely recommend Celeste, at the very least.
SPEAKER_2: But there's a couple of games in there that are like known and famous and stuff.
SPEAKER_2: And then there's a lot of games in there that I had never heard of before that I don't know what they are, that I don't know how to go through them.
SPEAKER_2: And there's so, so many games.
SPEAKER_2: I just, I don't know, I don't know how to go through them.
SPEAKER_2: I don't know how to explore all of the games and figure out which ones I would enjoy.
SPEAKER_2: And so, Clair, can you just help me figure out how we're going to sort through this huge bundle of games to find the best games that we will like the most?
SPEAKER_1: I have some good news and bad news.
SPEAKER_1: The good news is that I already went through every game and sort of filtered out the ones that I wanted to play.
SPEAKER_1: The bad news is I did it when it was at about 700 games.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, I was like, you went through all 1700?
SPEAKER_1: I did not realize they were adding to it, and I bought it and then spent, I think, eight hours sorting it.
SPEAKER_1: So that sucks.
SPEAKER_2: I've started sorting through the tabletop games specifically.
SPEAKER_2: I did find a site, I think it's called randomgamebundle.com, that it will give you a random game from the bundle, and you can set parameters.
SPEAKER_2: I've set for tabletop and physical games only, and there's 400 of those.
SPEAKER_1: There's literally an entire website dedicated to organizing that one bundle.
SPEAKER_2: It's not organizing.
SPEAKER_2: Let me send you the link, and you can see what I mean.
SPEAKER_2: It's basically giving you a random game from the bundle, and you can apply some filters to be like, I specifically want to look at a physical game.
SPEAKER_2: It's a lot to look through.
SPEAKER_1: This is great, because my biggest thing with itch.io is that they don't have a filter option on games you've bought, which was just going to be another one of my solutions of like, we just need to tell itch.io to build a dang filter into their bundle, even just like a search bar to search the games you've bought.
SPEAKER_1: I should say itch.io is a wonderful website.
SPEAKER_1: The other really shitty thing about itch.io is if you've bought a game and you go to the game's page, you cannot download the game from the page or access the download page from that page.
SPEAKER_1: It's a great website in terms of its point.
SPEAKER_2: They are clearly working on it.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, like I've heard talk that they're working on it, they're trying to make it better because they were like super not prepared for this thing.
SPEAKER_2: That they decided to do.
SPEAKER_1: Understandably, like who is like, oh yeah, our website, we're going to have a bundle with 1700 games in it, right?
SPEAKER_1: Like as a developer, I can already see that assumption where it's like, oh, you know, a bundle will have 50 games in it.
SPEAKER_1: I think that's a pretty reasonable assumption as an upper bound.
SPEAKER_1: And then this happens.
SPEAKER_1: So maybe Brianna, we need to just spend three hours on this website.
SPEAKER_1: You've sent me or I can send you my collection that I put together.
SPEAKER_1: And that gives us I think I had about 30 games that that would be good to just play.
SPEAKER_1: And alternatively, you could just play Celeste forever.
SPEAKER_2: I mean, I could.
SPEAKER_2: And listen, I would play that game forever, but I've played on Switch where it has controller.
SPEAKER_2: I mean, I guess I could hook up a controller.
SPEAKER_2: Here's the thing.
SPEAKER_2: What if the perfect game for me exists in this bundle and I own it and I miss it because I'm trying to go through all these games and there's so many of them, right?
SPEAKER_2: What if I missed finding the perfect game for me?
SPEAKER_2: If I didn't already know the She-Ra tabletop game for the honor is in there, I could have missed that and that would have been a goddamn shame, you know?
SPEAKER_1: I don't think you would be the person you are today if you missed the For Your Honor game.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, absolutely.
SPEAKER_2: You're right.
SPEAKER_1: But what I will say is if you want to be 100% certain, there is an assumption in computer science when you're iterating over a list that no matter where you are in that list, you cannot make an assumption that a condition has been met so far unless you know something about every item in that list, which means you have to play every game.
SPEAKER_2: OK, so how do I get enough time in terms of just my life to play all of these games?
SPEAKER_1: Let's see.
SPEAKER_1: Let's assume an upper bound of every single game is a game that you need to play.
SPEAKER_1: So 1700, we've already got an upper bound, and you spend one hour per game seeing if you like it or not, right?
SPEAKER_1: Because if it's the perfect game for you, you're going to like it within an hour.
SPEAKER_1: That has to be the thing.
SPEAKER_1: In fact, we could even lower that to 30 minutes.
SPEAKER_1: Generously, hey, we're going to upper bound, let's do an hour.
SPEAKER_1: So we're at 1700 hours so far.
SPEAKER_1: If you just dedicate like half a month, I think you're good.
SPEAKER_2: First of all, just going to quickly calculate how many...
SPEAKER_1: It's 70 days.
SPEAKER_1: It's 70 and a bit days.
SPEAKER_1: So my...
SPEAKER_2: So two and a half months.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, you know, hey, it's not your whole life.
SPEAKER_1: It's just two and a half months.
SPEAKER_1: Like, what else are you going to do for two and a half months?
SPEAKER_2: I guess my other question here, and we'll get to what else I would be doing.
SPEAKER_1: And this is an upper bound.
SPEAKER_1: I just want to remind you.
SPEAKER_2: But I guess my question here, did you calculate that by assuming that I will be playing games all 24 hours a day?
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, of course.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, let's do something more realistic and assume that I need to sleep.
SPEAKER_1: So it's 1700 by 16 because we got to get you that good eight hours of sleep.
SPEAKER_1: 106 days and then some.
SPEAKER_1: I'm just using integers.
SPEAKER_1: I don't give a shit about your ground down.
SPEAKER_2: So 106 days and that's like every hour of the day I'm playing games.
SPEAKER_2: I'm not eating.
SPEAKER_2: I'm only sleeping.
SPEAKER_2: That's it.
SPEAKER_2: That's all I do.
SPEAKER_2: So now here's my concern.
SPEAKER_2: I don't know if you've noticed.
SPEAKER_2: Now I've noticed a little something.
SPEAKER_2: That little something is there's a lot happening in the world right now, and I would die if I were to not be able to work on stuff to help with that and do my part to contribute to generally the things that are going on.
SPEAKER_2: So just kind of going AWOL for three and a half months feels irresponsible.
SPEAKER_2: And it would drive me mad to not kind of know and contribute to what's going on.
SPEAKER_1: So what I'm hearing is you care more about everyday life than finding the perfect game, Brianna.
SPEAKER_1: I don't know if you're really committed to this task.
SPEAKER_1: Something tells me.
SPEAKER_2: I mean, the way that I started out this craving was by saying I wanted a way to find a perfect game, not that I wanted to spend all this time, because I didn't need to come to you to be like, oh, yeah, I could just play every game for an hour.
SPEAKER_2: What I need is the super simple way for something else to go through all the games for me.
SPEAKER_1: You need to hire a game assistant.
SPEAKER_1: You need to get a professional gamer to work for you.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, my God.
SPEAKER_2: Yes, absolutely.
SPEAKER_2: So they have to be someone who has experience with both video games and tabletop games and knows in depth my taste and what I will enjoy.
SPEAKER_2: So with that in mind, you're going to clone yourself.
SPEAKER_2: I'm going to clone myself.
SPEAKER_2: Yes.
SPEAKER_2: Or?
SPEAKER_1: Nope, that's the only solution.
SPEAKER_2: No, I was going to suggest that you want to be my gamer assistant, Clair.
SPEAKER_1: See, this is what I meant when there's no other solution.
SPEAKER_1: I thought about that and I was like, nope.
SPEAKER_1: The thing is, I already did it.
SPEAKER_1: I already went through the games and thought about the ones that I wanted to play.
SPEAKER_2: All right, I need to clone myself to make me become a gamer assistant.
SPEAKER_1: And see, the best part of this is you can do it repeatedly.
SPEAKER_1: You can make a board game specific Brianna and a video game specific Brianna.
SPEAKER_1: And a Brianna that councils you on how you are Brianna, Brianna.
SPEAKER_2: Damn.
SPEAKER_1: What if you used your clones as therapists?
SPEAKER_2: I mean, I was like, I would be a terrible therapist for myself, but I might not be a bad therapist for myself.
SPEAKER_2: Right.
SPEAKER_2: I would probably be an all right therapist for myself.
SPEAKER_2: So maybe a therapy clone is a good idea.
SPEAKER_2: But really, this is about games.
SPEAKER_2: Let's not make this about mental health.
SPEAKER_2: Fuck mental health.
SPEAKER_2: I don't know what mental health even is.
SPEAKER_2: What this is about is games.
SPEAKER_1: I haven't heard of a mental health in my entire life and neither of the gaming industry.
SPEAKER_1: So let's move on.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, come for the last of us to like that.
SPEAKER_1: Uh, yeah.
SPEAKER_2: How do you clone yourself?
SPEAKER_2: How does one do that?
SPEAKER_1: I think you just send your DNA to ancestry.com and then in like 50 years, they're gonna make a clone army that comes after us and probably replaces us all.
SPEAKER_2: So I've been watching a little bit of Star Wars, the Clone Wars, and I can tell you...
SPEAKER_2: Oh, so you're the expert.
SPEAKER_1: Why are you asking me, Brianna?
SPEAKER_1: You've been watching the documentary, Clone Wars, the Star Wars.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, Clone Wars, the Star Wars.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, that's right.
SPEAKER_2: So I think what I actually probably need is just to go to Camino and talk to the weird, long neck dudes.
SPEAKER_1: Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_1: I know what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_1: I'm on the same wavelength.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, Camino.
SPEAKER_1: Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_2: Here, let me show you a picture of a Camino.
SPEAKER_2: Of a Camino.
SPEAKER_1: Look, I know so much about what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_1: I'm a Camine pro.
SPEAKER_1: You see?
SPEAKER_2: So you're going to have no reaction when I send you this image, right?
SPEAKER_2: Because you're just going to be like, yeah, that's a Caminoan.
SPEAKER_1: Look, I mean, I already know.
SPEAKER_1: Look, you don't need to send me any image just because I already know.
SPEAKER_2: This is what Caminoans look like.
SPEAKER_2: These are the cloners.
SPEAKER_1: Those are earthworms.
SPEAKER_1: Brianna, they've given earthworms clothes.
SPEAKER_2: They're really, they're actually some of my favorite aliens in Star Wars because they're weird and unsettling for basically no reason.
SPEAKER_2: They're basically just like...
SPEAKER_1: They're like the birds with arms Reddit, but it's the new Reddit of earthworms with arms and also clothes.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, they're great.
SPEAKER_2: I love them.
SPEAKER_2: They're weird as hell.
SPEAKER_2: So yeah, those are Caminoans.
SPEAKER_2: And so I just need to talk to some of them and they'll be like, Master Brianna, we've been waiting for you.
SPEAKER_1: Now are you training to become a Jedi too?
SPEAKER_1: I don't know.
SPEAKER_1: Are there non-Jedi Masters?
SPEAKER_2: But they'll kind of assume I'm a Jedi because who else would want clones, really?
SPEAKER_2: And then they'll be like, we've been expecting you.
SPEAKER_2: The clone process is going according to schedule.
SPEAKER_2: And I'll be like, ah, yes, the clones that I ordered.
SPEAKER_2: And it'll just be that entire sequence from Attack of the Clones in which Master Obi-Wan Kenobi goes to.
SPEAKER_2: But it'll be clones of me.
SPEAKER_2: And I'll be like, these are these are sick.
SPEAKER_2: And then they'll and then all the clones will be like, yo.
SPEAKER_2: And it'll be really extended because the entire army will say.
SPEAKER_1: It's like that video of Billy Mays where it's every single time he says Billy Mays here, but it's overlapped.
SPEAKER_1: So it's the only thing you hear.
SPEAKER_1: I'm going to send you that video afterwards.
SPEAKER_1: It's very funny.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, I don't think I've heard it before, but I know the general type of that video, right?
SPEAKER_1: I actually want your reaction on the recording.
SPEAKER_1: So I found the video and I'm just making sure it's the right video.
SPEAKER_1: This is the right video.
SPEAKER_1: Go ahead and just give this a listen.
SPEAKER_1: You really only need to listen to the first 10 seconds or so.
SPEAKER_2: Oh no, I'm terrified.
SPEAKER_1: Bye.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, good lord.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, right, yep, I got it, I got it.
SPEAKER_2: And to that, I wonder if that got picked up on my audio.
SPEAKER_1: Oh, I see you.
SPEAKER_2: I don't see you, but I hear you.
SPEAKER_1: Uh-oh.
SPEAKER_2: That video was so powerful, it shut off my internet.
SPEAKER_1: It destroyed everything.
SPEAKER_2: That video was so powerful.
SPEAKER_2: I think, A, I think it got picked up on my audio, so have fun with that.
SPEAKER_2: Uh, B, that video was so powerful, it actually made my internet disconnect from my computer for a minute.
SPEAKER_2: That was an experience.
SPEAKER_2: That was wild.
SPEAKER_1: And so that's just gonna be you.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, that's gonna be me.
SPEAKER_2: That's absolutely gonna be me.
SPEAKER_2: It's gonna be great.
SPEAKER_2: It's gonna be amazing.
SPEAKER_2: This is the best possible solution.
SPEAKER_2: All right, tell me cravings, cravings, cravings.
SPEAKER_1: Ah, so my next craving is, uh, decentralizing men's feelings in both trans and cis spaces.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, no.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, no, we're going here on Salt Cravings.
SPEAKER_1: Oh.
SPEAKER_1: So about every week.
SPEAKER_2: Clair, trans misogyny affects all trans people.
SPEAKER_1: Oh, you saw the same.
SPEAKER_1: You saw the same tweet, didn't you?
SPEAKER_2: Of course.
SPEAKER_1: It happens about every week.
SPEAKER_1: It happens at least once every week.
SPEAKER_2: Every week you log on and you're like, oh, they're good.
SPEAKER_2: All right.
SPEAKER_2: Same shit as usual.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, about every every week.
SPEAKER_1: There's usually a guy in the trans community who is basically sad that we don't talk about trans men more in general.
SPEAKER_1: All the while, we do.
SPEAKER_2: Throwing trans women under the bus?
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, you throw trans women under the bus in order to centralize men's feelings.
SPEAKER_1: That's, you know, it happens in cis communities.
SPEAKER_1: It happens in trans communities.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, serious for a second.
SPEAKER_2: The specific dynamic tends to be that trans men are frustrated with the lack of talk and representation of trans men and trans masculine people, and tend to see that as a sign that trans men are more oppressed than trans women, which ignores the impact of trans misogyny and the fact that trans women's representation is often fetishization or straight-up trans misogyny and all these sorts of different things.
SPEAKER_2: Hashtag read whipping girl.
SPEAKER_1: There's also, like, another aspect to this, where a lot of trans men think that, like you joked about, but what is very commonly echoed is that trans men and non-binary, non-trans women are also affected by trans misogyny, which is often, in reality, just a misunderstanding of what trans misogyny is and what transphobia is.
SPEAKER_1: Because, yes, trans people are all affected by, say it with me, transphobia.
SPEAKER_1: But not all trans people are affected by trans misogyny.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, because trans misogyny does not just mean transphobia and misogyny.
SPEAKER_2: It is a specific term for the specific...
SPEAKER_1: Experience of a trans woman.
SPEAKER_2: Experience and oppression of trans women and trans femme people and just people who are impacted by trans misogyny.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, so it's often a misunderstanding and mischaracterization of this.
SPEAKER_2: And it's the same sort of dynamics you see play out in cis spaces with a lot of men wanting to center their own feelings.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, men feeling upset.
SPEAKER_1: And of course, then it's like, well, I'm upset, so I deserve a space to talk about this.
SPEAKER_1: And you know what?
SPEAKER_1: Honestly, yeah, they do.
SPEAKER_1: But usually it's not the space that they center themselves in.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, and it's often very much this thing of like, okay, well, we were talking about the things that we are experiencing, and yes, misogyny and patriarchy and all these things, it negatively impacts us all, but it negatively impacts us in particular ways and in different ways.
SPEAKER_2: And like, just because more people know that we exist does not actually mean we are privileged in that way.
SPEAKER_2: There's lots of, yeah, this is a discourse that pops up so often.
SPEAKER_2: It's so frustrating.
SPEAKER_2: So let's just make jokes about it.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah.
SPEAKER_1: So how are we fixing this?
SPEAKER_1: So we like feelings basin.
SPEAKER_1: It's like, what if a sink, but out of the tap comes feelings?
SPEAKER_1: And so whenever you're feeling feelings, if you just need to let your feelings out, we'll just have a feelings basin for you.
SPEAKER_1: Pour your feelings down and get rid of all those feelings.
SPEAKER_2: True.
SPEAKER_2: It's like a little kaleidoscope soup.
SPEAKER_2: Sometimes it's good to process those feelings though.
SPEAKER_1: Nope, no processing feelings here, only jokes.
SPEAKER_2: No, I've decided, I know how we're going to make the feelings process.
SPEAKER_1: We're going to get your Brianna clones to give everybody therapy.
SPEAKER_2: I would not put them through that.
SPEAKER_2: I would never do such a thing to them.
SPEAKER_2: But what I would do is I would create man feelings flower, because really processing feelings is the same as processing wheat into bread.
SPEAKER_2: So we're going to create man feelings bread, and men can learn how to bake bread from their feelings flower.
SPEAKER_2: You know, I think it's an acquired taste.
SPEAKER_1: We are on a podcast called Salt Cravings, and I think I've talked myself into this hole where now we need to make man feelings bread.
SPEAKER_2: Well, I think specifically men should make man feelings bread, and then they can eat the bread and then they'll be like, wow, this feels like I've processed this and come through this.
SPEAKER_1: I'm for equality.
SPEAKER_1: I think everybody should make man feelings bread.
SPEAKER_2: That's what equality is.
SPEAKER_2: I think everyone should make feelings bread.
SPEAKER_2: Welcome to 2022.
SPEAKER_2: Gender feelings bread.
SPEAKER_1: The new hot take is that man feelings bread is so 2020 and that the new bread is is gender neutral feelings bread.
SPEAKER_2: Gender neutral feelings bread or just gender feelings bread.
SPEAKER_2: You know, we all get gender feelings and I think we could make that into bread.
SPEAKER_1: I don't think everyone gets gender feelings, Brianna.
SPEAKER_2: I forgot about cis people.
SPEAKER_1: Uh, uh-huh.
SPEAKER_2: What a wonderful world.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, Clair, I just lived in the most wonderful world where everyone is, like, trans, and the only things we have to deal with are, like, intra-community shit, and, like, there are no cis people.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, Clair, you can't, I need, I want it back.
SPEAKER_2: I want this world back.
SPEAKER_1: I'm sorry, Brianna, I burst you out of that bubble, and all you've got left is bread.
SPEAKER_2: All things turn to bread in the end.
SPEAKER_1: You either die a person or live long enough to see yourself become bread.
SPEAKER_2: God, this is that one meme that's like, I know, I don't want to become bread.
SPEAKER_2: I don't want to become bread.
SPEAKER_2: I'm actually fine with being bread.
SPEAKER_1: I don't know that meme, but I love it.
SPEAKER_2: All right, I'm just going to post this, and you can watch this.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, no.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, that's an accurate representation.
SPEAKER_2: That is the experience of feelings bread is, okay, you know, first, oftentimes you don't want to process your feelings, right?
SPEAKER_2: You just want to feel the things and be mad at other people, right?
SPEAKER_2: But you don't want to actually go through the process of processing them.
SPEAKER_2: And so obviously, you're going to struggle against the desire for your feelings to become bread.
SPEAKER_2: But eventually, you will come to understand that being bread is the only way to destroy patriarchy.
SPEAKER_1: Bread isn't even my final form.
SPEAKER_2: What's your next craving?
SPEAKER_2: Bam.
SPEAKER_2: It's been, it's bam, about...
SPEAKER_2: Thank you.
SPEAKER_2: It's been about a year since I finally officially graduated from university.
SPEAKER_1: That means it's been about a year for me too.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah.
SPEAKER_2: And I feel like I'm finally able to read books again, and write things again, and engage with words again.
SPEAKER_2: Because for pretty much a full year, I just couldn't, I just really truly could not do anything that resembled school stuff.
SPEAKER_2: The other day, I read Our Prison's Obsolete by Angela Davis, which I think is the first piece of theory that I finished since I graduated.
SPEAKER_2: Today, I actually wrote things.
SPEAKER_2: I'm finally getting back to it.
SPEAKER_2: And what I guess I'm craving is a better school system that doesn't make you burn out so heavily, that like you can't bear to think about or look at the thing that you were doing for four or five years or however many years because you burned out so hard because the school system and the post-secondary system is such a disaster.
SPEAKER_2: Can you help me fix school?
SPEAKER_1: So first, we're going to turn all the schools into prisons.
SPEAKER_1: All right, we're already done step one, and then we're going to abolish all prisons.
SPEAKER_2: All right, I'm glad I let you continue because that is the best place that I say we could have gone.
SPEAKER_2: And really, if you think about Foucault, aren't schools already prisons?
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, step one is basically done because schools are already prisons and the school to prison pipeline exists.
SPEAKER_1: This is something, a great thing to know about my school that I went to UBC is that the head chancellor was an ex-CEO of the HSBC Bank, which really, I think, tells you a lot about what you need to know about what universities actually are.
SPEAKER_1: And colleges, I guess, because this is an inclusive show.
SPEAKER_2: Ecology.
SPEAKER_2: That's a different thing.
SPEAKER_1: Nope, it's the same now.
SPEAKER_2: So, okay, so what you're saying is we're abolishing all schools.
SPEAKER_2: So when we talk about prison abolition, right, what we're actually, what we're talking about is eating a society and putting things into different services so that we don't need police and we don't need prisons anymore, right?
SPEAKER_2: That we can move past the need for those things.
SPEAKER_2: And in fact, that the need has never actually been there and that we can create a better world.
SPEAKER_2: So I guess my question is, is there some sort of replacement for schools?
SPEAKER_2: What do we put our energy and our time and our money into in order to help people learn, you know?
SPEAKER_2: Because learning is valuable.
SPEAKER_1: I'd like to propose a wild thought.
SPEAKER_1: Have you ever heard of a library?
SPEAKER_2: So I've heard about libraries.
SPEAKER_2: In fact, I've even been to some.
SPEAKER_1: Now what if, now stay with me for a second.
SPEAKER_1: What if we put the library in the internet?
SPEAKER_1: And what if we called that library an archive?
SPEAKER_1: We could call it the Internet Archives.
SPEAKER_1: And then the system in which we live in could get angry at it until eventually people realize that it's actually a good idea.
SPEAKER_2: Oh no.
SPEAKER_1: You've heard about this, right?
SPEAKER_1: You know of the Internet Archives.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, I know about this.
SPEAKER_2: I do.
SPEAKER_2: It makes me sad.
SPEAKER_1: Look, libraries are a socialist scam that just want to get your data, and I don't know what else they're trying to say.
SPEAKER_1: They all hate libraries too, I'm pretty sure.
SPEAKER_2: Clair, how does this help?
SPEAKER_2: How does this help us learn?
SPEAKER_1: We're going to make, we're going to fund the Internet Archive, Brianna.
SPEAKER_1: That's how we're spreading the university money.
SPEAKER_1: We're going to defund the universities, and we're going to make the Internet Archive freely available and very useful actually for accessing and using information.
SPEAKER_2: My question then becomes, how do you sort through the information?
SPEAKER_2: How do you recommend different pieces of work?
SPEAKER_1: Those are good questions, and that's what needs to be answered.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, so you're saying we need to do some studies.
SPEAKER_2: Sounds pretty university to me.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, see, the only way to defeat the system is from the inside.
SPEAKER_2: With incremental reformist change from the inside.
SPEAKER_2: Working slowly, not too rashly, you know.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, that's the only way to create change.
SPEAKER_1: I mean, show me one instance in history where change has happened overnight.
SPEAKER_1: Do it, I dare you.
SPEAKER_1: Also, don't show me anything.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, show me one instance in history in which trying to destroy the system and bring about a new system has ever actually happened.
SPEAKER_2: That's what I thought.
SPEAKER_1: See, Brianna, if you just do that, then you're just going to get the same system because you're just overthrowing the system with the same system.
SPEAKER_1: So A plus A equals A, Q, E, D, I'm much smarter than you.
SPEAKER_2: Oh, I learned that in logic class.
SPEAKER_2: Yes, of course.
SPEAKER_2: I do think that there are certain values to listening to experts and to being able to know who is an expert.
SPEAKER_2: I think we need to define expertise differently, and I think we need to have more understandings of expertise.
SPEAKER_2: But I do think there is value in learning from experts and learning from expert pieces of work and from expert individuals.
SPEAKER_2: I would love for there to be a version of that that exists outside of the university.
SPEAKER_1: I do have a very important question.
SPEAKER_1: Where are we going to find these people who used to be perts?
SPEAKER_1: Where are we going to find these experts?
SPEAKER_2: I find they usually hang around the pert place.
SPEAKER_2: They hang around the pert place, still they're not allowed in because they're experts.
SPEAKER_2: But they're usually still hanging out outside.
SPEAKER_2: Right, they're pertinent about it.
SPEAKER_2: That's what that word means.
SPEAKER_2: They're pert-sistant.
SPEAKER_2: They usually hang out outside, and they're like, they won't let me in.
SPEAKER_2: They say I'm an expert, but no, I'm still pert.
SPEAKER_2: And then we can go to them and we can say, no, it's okay, you're an expert and we value, and we're going to create a space for experts.
SPEAKER_1: What do you have to do to lose your pert status?
SPEAKER_1: Like, that's what it's about, right?
SPEAKER_1: It's all everyone wants to lose their pert card.
SPEAKER_1: Holy shit.
SPEAKER_1: Wait, is your pert card the same as yours in your virginity?
SPEAKER_2: Are you saying all experts fuck?
SPEAKER_1: Look, I don't know if you've been to any, like, conventions for academia, but yes.
SPEAKER_2: I have, and yes, they do.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, and also they're usually...
SPEAKER_2: You're absolutely right.
SPEAKER_2: Sorry, just never mind.
SPEAKER_1: Processing.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, let's move on.
SPEAKER_2: So, we get experts.
SPEAKER_1: What is your craving?
SPEAKER_2: My craving is specifically...
SPEAKER_1: Oh, right.
SPEAKER_1: I forgot we were on your craving.
SPEAKER_1: Hey, Brianna, what if I had a memory?
SPEAKER_2: Damn, we should do that as a craving sometime.
SPEAKER_2: Specifically, I am looking to make the school system one that doesn't cause us to like burn out and hate the subjects we studied in school.
SPEAKER_1: See, I didn't get a chance because...
SPEAKER_1: Well, I guess I did because what I studied was like a bunch of theory, and then I immediately went into industry, which I could pick out maybe three or four courses in my entire degree that I could do those courses and be pretty much just as good at my job.
SPEAKER_1: And everything else is really good for if I wanted to go into theory or research.
SPEAKER_1: Who knows?
SPEAKER_1: I kind of do, but also I hate academia.
SPEAKER_2: Maybe we need shorter and more hyper specific degrees.
SPEAKER_2: You have to decide when you choose your degree.
SPEAKER_2: No, but they're really specific.
SPEAKER_2: You have to choose the exact job, the exact position, the exact thing you're going to be doing.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, and you have to do a different one, right?
SPEAKER_2: You're going to have to go through all the courses again, because all the courses are specifically for the specific thing that you're going to do.
SPEAKER_2: So for your industry, you have to do the specific three or four courses.
SPEAKER_2: It's one semester, and you're done and you're out there.
SPEAKER_2: And that's the only job you know how to do, and you don't know anything else.
SPEAKER_2: Great.
SPEAKER_2: Let's release high school with that.
SPEAKER_2: Like, why do you need a general knowledge when you can have this hyper-specific, work-based knowledge?
SPEAKER_1: Yes, it is all about...
SPEAKER_2: Where you can prepare for the job that you'll have which defines you as a person and should define you as a person.
SPEAKER_1: Right, it's all about making sure that we can get people into the workforce as fast as possible, and to not really make them individual thinkers.
SPEAKER_1: That would be awful to supply them with a...
SPEAKER_1: So, I mean, why not even start earlier, right?
SPEAKER_1: Like, we can start modifying children, we can modify their DNA to make them really good at specific jobs, and then we could just tell them what to do.
SPEAKER_1: Think about that.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, like, no thought on their part.
SPEAKER_2: This is a really good idea.
SPEAKER_2: It's a really great idea.
SPEAKER_1: We've given them a service.
SPEAKER_2: And you have exactly the amount of workers you need for whatever job you've decided that the government should be doing.
SPEAKER_2: And if you think about it, the thing that I will say here, the caveat, is you can't have a government that changes up all the time because they'll say they've done it already.
SPEAKER_2: No, we have already kids here.
SPEAKER_2: You have to have one government, no other alternatives, always the same government, just forever.
SPEAKER_2: So this seems like a really good political and economic and educational system.
SPEAKER_1: I agree.
SPEAKER_2: So, yeah, let's just get to work on that.
SPEAKER_1: And then in the meantime, we'll abolish prisons.
SPEAKER_1: There's no prisons.
SPEAKER_1: It's the perfect system.
SPEAKER_1: Everything else is great.
SPEAKER_1: We've given people jobs from birth and prisons are no longer a thing.
SPEAKER_1: This is what the leftists want.
SPEAKER_2: This is what all leftists believe.
SPEAKER_1: All leftists hold the same beliefs, and there's no infighting between what a better future looks like.
SPEAKER_2: Ask a group of leftists what they believe.
SPEAKER_2: They will say the exact same words to you in sync, like, just right back to you.
SPEAKER_1: Yeah, because we've all injected the beliefs into our DNA from birth, and the government told us what to believe.
SPEAKER_1: Because the government is actually a leftist controlled mind hive, out to chase down all the lovely...
SPEAKER_2: Well, that is all the time we have today, everyone.
SPEAKER_2: We have had an incredible show tonight.
SPEAKER_2: Thank you so much, Clair, for coming on.
SPEAKER_2: It's been great to have you.
SPEAKER_1: Thanks.
SPEAKER_2: It was so much fun to talk about our Cravings on this show today.
SPEAKER_2: Did we talk about Cravings?
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, yeah, we did.
SPEAKER_2: That was the show that we did.
SPEAKER_1: I don't remember.
SPEAKER_2: So with that, remember to follow us at Salt Cravings on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for all our hot tweets where we're connected with the teens.
SPEAKER_1: We tweet on Facebook.
SPEAKER_1: That's how you know we're advanced.
SPEAKER_2: Yeah, that's how you know that we really get it.
SPEAKER_2: I will also say...
SPEAKER_1: If you have a Craving for if you want to come on The Tonight Show with Price, then you can send those Cravings over at submissions at saltcravings.com.
SPEAKER_1: And there's also a Patreon.
SPEAKER_1: And if you give a dollar too, then there will be a dollar that we can use towards the show.
SPEAKER_2: Yes, of course.
SPEAKER_2: As we know, all good late night shows are...
SPEAKER_1: Funded by Patreon.
SPEAKER_2: And so that's how we keep the lights on and keep bringing on incredible guests like Clair.
SPEAKER_2: Let's have one more hand for her as we as we usher off the stage.
SPEAKER_2: Go, leave.
SPEAKER_1: Do you ever think about Jimmy Kibble's show and his Patreon?
SPEAKER_2: Hello?
SPEAKER_2: Anything?
SPEAKER_1: Bueller.
SPEAKER_2: Bueller.
SPEAKER_2: Okay, we're just going to go with this.
SPEAKER_1: Yes.